Friends, Humor, Nonsense, Pinterest

Moscato In Cupcake Form. Is this Supposed to Smell Like Throw Up??

I should have known this was coming.
I have pinned great recipes from Pinterest for over a year and a half now and I haven’t had a true fail yet.
In fact, as of late, I had made three to four blogger created recipes via Pinterest a week and they were all amazing.
I was almost waiting for the other shoe to drop.
And drop it did.
A huge thud.
It happened when I found this recipe:

Moscato Cupcakes


I wrote underneath the pin, “it’s like the mothership is callin’ me home”.
Because if you really know me, you know I love white wine.
And my weapon of choice is Moscato.

Here is the back story:

My brother introduced me to Moscato a few years ago.
I fell in love with her immediately.
And now we are celebrating our two-year anniversary in May.

So when I saw this recipe?
It’s like the wine Gods were smiling down on me.
I mean, really?
You don’t hear about Pinot cupcakes or Riesling cupcakes.
So I immediately copied the recipe from here.
Now, I am not in any way trying to say that the above blogger is trying to pull the wool over my eyes and lay down a really bad recipe.
She most likely used a better brand of Moscato.
I won’t mention the name of the wine I used because I am afraid they will take me in the night if I smear it on my blog.
However, if you want to know what brand it is, email me and I will be happy to share.
I will tell you my favorite brand is one of the cheapest out there and is also the one they have pictured on their blog: Barefoot.
You can get it at Wal-Mart for $4.95.
Also the Moscato they serve at Olive Garden is magical too.

UPDATE- The Moiselle brand at Aldi is amazing as well as the Blue Fin brand at Trader Joe’s. Both cost only $4.99. 

I can hear the wine snobs now and you can just seal your lips right now.
I like cheap wine. And I cannot lie.

So I was having a girl’s night in with my neighbor the other night at her house.
The kids were gone and we were going to eat some fattening food, drink some cheap wine and watch 2009 reruns of Real Housewives of New Jersey.
I remembered the Moscato cupcakes I found on Pinterest and was all like, OMG I am so gonna make these for our girls night in!
And my neighbor was really stoked as well, so it was all excitement and anticipation.

I had the basic ingredients and all I needed to get was buttermilk and powdered sugar for the frosting.
Go here for the full recipe.

So everything was going great; I was mixing it all together and the batter looked like normal cupcake batter.
When I was baking it, it smelled like bread baking.
So that must mean good, right?

I took it out and all the cupcakes were concave.


Apparently, my first mistake was making them without the cupcake liners.
I only sprayed the holes with Pam and saw afterward that she said to use liners.
I was all like, they should be fine.
They weren’t fine.
I had to use the above knife to get them out.
And when I did get them out?
Crumbly, disgusting-looking muffin tops.

So then I decided to go ahead and make the frosting to try and salvage this dessert.
I didn’t have the two sticks of butter they asked for so I decided that instead of running to Hell-Mart on a Saturday afternoon with a four-year-old in tow that I was gonna half the recipe instead.
Oh, and I used margarine instead of butter.
I know it’s not the same but I have made the substitution many a time in recipes and usually, it’s just fine.
Plus there’s the Wal-Mart Saturday afternoon freak show I wanted to avoid.
This is what it looked like when I was done:

You can’t really tell from the picture how truly gross this turned out.
There were runny wine and vanilla at the bottom that wouldn’t soak up.
And then there was the smell.
It smelled like vomit.
Or the afterparty, if you will.
Yet, at this point, I did not want to concede defeat.
I will not fail.
If Brooke can do this, so can I dammit!
It wasn’t until I pulled the muffin top cupcakes out of the pan leaving most of it in the pan and spread the vomit icing on top of it that I finally gave up.

It looks like someone threw this up.


And Brooke, I love you so much, I do.
Because anyone who comes up with wine cupcakes is pretty awesome in my little book.
But next girls’ night, will you come to my house and make them for us?
I will make you some homemade tacos!
Because I know I can’t mess that up.

7 thoughts on “Moscato In Cupcake Form. Is this Supposed to Smell Like Throw Up??”

  1. My comment isnt posting!! anyhow i just wanna say that is HA-larious…i was gagging as i was reading your post and busting up all at once. I've seen those on pinterest. Thanks for trying them for me.. hahaAntonia


  2. OMG it makes me so mad that blogger lets spam comments get on here but beloved readers like you have trouble! UGH!! Thanks for the sweet comment Antonia! And now you know to use the good stuff! 🙂


  3. That is hilarious! I LOVE moscato, too…probably my favorite wine of all times! Bummer that the recipe didn't work out, such a fabulous idea!


  4. This post is hilarious! I am with you…I usually have about 95% luck with Pinterest, but there are some recipes that go oh so wrong!


  5. I usually have such luck, as I said. But this one was a doozy. I am still shivering thinking about it. < shudder >


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