Blogging, Friends, Humor

NYC BABY!!! Bethenny Doesn’t Know Who The Hell I Am


I’m back!!
Did you even know I was gone??
I went on a whirlwind trip to New York City with my friend Jen last week!
A few months ago, I wrote about how Jen won a trip to see the Bethenny show, all expenses paid for two, and she invited me to go along with her!!
You should go back and read the post.
It was self-deprecation at its finest and pretty darn funny if I do say so myself.


Kari and Jen
Me and my pretty friend Jen.
I am the Rhoda in this relationship.

I was so honored that she chose me to go and since I had never been to NYC before, I was so excited!
Until the week of.
Then I started getting nervous.
REALLY nervous.
I have many neuroses that if I told all of them to you here, you would probably stop reading my blog.
Or give me the number to a really good therapist.
One of the said neuroses is that I am terrified of flying without my children.
Should the plane go down in flames and leave my daughters orphans.
I have only flown twice without both children.
Once when Anna was three and once with Annie but without Ellie when we went to Florida in June.

I told Jen on the plane, in essence, that it took almost everything I could muster to leave my car that morning at the airport (with a sobbing five-year-old in the back seat, mind you) and get on this plane.
So this trip was big.
For many reasons but definitely because of the above.
And it will never happen again.
Or my kids are goin’ with me.


Planning and organizing

It takes a lot of note-taking and organizing when mommy goes away.
This is just for one day.
And I was gone for two and a half.


My suitcase died

Then my suitcase got sick.
And died.
But my bestie Rebecca came to my rescue by lending me one of her suitcases!


Our plane waiting to take us to NYC

Side story:
I nicely asked the person at the American desk if our plane was on time.
She (obviously annoyed by my question) replied, “Should be”.
I came back relayed the reply to Jen and said something about how I was so glad we are flying with confidence here at American Airlines.
It wasn’t until we got off the plane in NYC that we noticed Mrs. Personality was our co-pilot.
Lesson: don’t ask your pilots about flight schedules. ISN’T IT ENOUGH THAT THEY GET YOU FROM POINT A TO POINT B??!?!

Jen and I on the plane after landing in NYC
photo courtesy of Jennifer Evers
OK lets party!
NYC, are you ready for all this kinds of awesome!?!?
Our nice driver in NYC

The Bethenny show sent a driver for Jen and me!
We had a driver!!
I wanted to somehow work that into a conversation while there.
Something like, “Oh yes, our driver wears cologne like that“….or “I don’t know how to navigate midtown traffic, you know since we have a driver.”
Meet Walter!
Our driver!!
Never gets old……


Sign for Brooklyn

While Walter was driving us from LaGuardia airport to our hotel somewhere in Manhattan, I tried to take out the window pictures.
See that green sign under the rear view mirror?
It said Brooklyn on it.
And I got all excited because we were close enough to Brooklyn to see a sign for Brooklyn!
So that sign says, Brooklyn.
Trust me.


Driving over the bridge into Manhattan NYC

Hello New York City.


Interior of Hudson Hotel NYC

This, my friends, was the hotel lobby.
It was fantasmical.
Totally needed a made up word.
Never seen anything like it in my life.
And I can guarantee, had this been on my dime, I could never afford this.
I would be at the Super 8 in Queens.


Cool chandelier in our NYC hotel room

OK so see that chandelier?
It was above only one side of the registration desk.
And I would never have noticed it until the lady ahead of us said something like, “so do only the fancy people go under the chandelier to check in?!?
By the way, we didn’t get to check in under the chandelier.


Our cool NYC hotel room

Isn’t this room amazing???
It looked like a Ralph Lauren store in here.
Without all of all the polo shirts.


That's NYC outside my window


The cute guy at the front desk gave us a view.
A room with a view, people, get your heads out of the gutter.
My feet in NYC


This what I do when I go on vacation.
I take pictures of my feet relaxing.
Here are my feet relaxing in NYC, BABY!
NYC at night


I am in a room with a view.
In New York City.
Pinch me.
Tiny hotel bathroom NYC

New York City is famous for many things.
One of such things?
Small bathrooms.
Which is a logistical nightmare when you have two females trying to get ready for their television debut.
Actually, it was MY television debut since Jen has been on TV several times.

No, wait.
This was my TV debut:

Outside Channel 7 News in Chicago

At the end of the Channel 7 newscast here in Chicago.
Movin’ on up.
See that cool cat next to me with the big smile and stocking cap?
He had THE most amazing playlist on his radio.
I could tell he was a regular.
He came prepared.



Bethenny show exterior


Beth to the Enny!!!!
Line waiting to get in to the Bethenny Show


See that long line of guests waiting to get in?

We didn’t have to wait in it.

VIP baby!
VIP room at the Bethenny Show

Above is what the “VIP room” looks like.
This is nothing like the “green room”.
Because we didn’t get snacks or anything.
And I am pretty sure my rider said I like WHITE M and M’s dammit!
We DID get to watch a video about Bethenny Frankel’s life over and over.
And over.
And over.


Forms at the Bethenny show

They gave everyone one of these forms to fill out.
That was their first mistake.
Giving me ANYTHING with spaces to write something on.
And I totally turned this in, as is.
You are welcome.


I ruined my nail before my Bethenny show debut


 I mentioned my mani night friggin mare in my original post.
Keepin’ the dream alive.
That’s a bald spot on my nail, thankyouverymuch.
Cool papers at the Bethenny Show

Backstage, there were “important” papers just laying around.
Like schedules etc.
I should have taken one.
But I didn’t want to be the “bad seed” who “ruins it for everyone”.


Waiting backstage at Bethenny to get to our seats

Almost there!!


Backstage at the Bethenny Show


Bethenny show

I am not gonna lie.
When I got out here, I was giddy.
Giddier than I would like to admit to.
I am a star-struck kind of person so to be here was pretty, to steal a word from my friend Jen, fanflippintastic.


Bethenny show set

I have to say, the set was really funky.
The colors and cool decorations were pretty sweet.


Bethenny Show set

See those monitors?
We weren’t allowed to look at them.
Now imagine being told you cannot look at these or the camera, only Bethenny wherever she is in the studio for an entire hour plus.
It was kind of hard at first.
Because if you put me in front of a TV screen of any kind, chances are, I am gonna look at it.
I was even afraid to talk to Jen sitting next to me for fear the camera police would come and pull me out of the audience.

Bethenny Show Set


I want that dresser.
Or whatever it is for.
I bet the staff has cookies shoved in there.
For later.
Jen and I doing duck face at the Bethenny show,

I made a duck face.
But it was a totally joking duck face.

This was actually the last picture we took until the show was over.
Because taking pictures is frowned upon while taping even during commercials, as Jen found out.

So here is what happened:

– the “audience coordinator” or as I called her ” the funny lady with curly hair” told jokes, held dance contests on stage, had us dance to Beyoncé and JT. ..etc etc. She was amazing by the way and I totally want to be her when I grow up.

– they work you into a frenzy. They do. Case in point, when I would watch the show at home and hear/see the audience dancing and going crazy while the theme song Calling All My Girls was playing? I was shaking my head and thinking NO WAY WILL THAT BE ME.

 It will.

You get so much adrenaline pumped into you from the curly haired girl who yells, WHO IS COMIN’ OUT THAT DOOR???? WHO IS COMIN’ OUT THAT  DOOR?? That by the time Bethenny comes out that door, I was ready to buy any and all of the Amway products she was selling. YES, YES I NEED THE FLOOR WAX BETHENNY!!!! CALLIN ALL MY GIRLSSSSS!!!!

– Bethenny is good at what she does. She didn’t have to do any takes or whatever they call it when realebrities mess their lines up. (I made up that word, by the way and my spell check is going ape nuts). She was professional and seemed pretty down to earth, for a realebrity anyway. She even offered a guest in the audience a breath mint. Don’t worry, they probably needed it since they didn’t give us snacks.

– Bethenny recognized Jen when she raised her hand to talk about the topic at hand. She said to Jen, “don’t I know you” or something like that. Jen mentioned how she won the contest and something to the effect of “here is Kari, you talked to her on the phone”. And this is when Bethenny looked at me like she had no idea what the hell Jen was talking about. The camera probably won’t capture that. But I saw it. It’s all good though. I got on camera. But I can’t wait to see the goofy CALLIN ALL MY GIRLS I LOVE YOU BETHENNY look I gave to millions of viewers. Which is part of the reason I might not tell you when the show airs.

So since Jen is all chummy with Bethenny, during a commercial break as Bethenny walks by she says, “can we get a picture together?”
And this is where I fall in love with her all over again.
Bethenny, not Jen, I never stopped loving Jen….keep up!!
Bethenny gets down on the stage after filming, looks up at us and waves us down.
The only other people down there were security guards….lots of them…..and producers etc.


Jen Evers, Bethenny Frankel and Kari Wagner Hoban

Remember the time I stood next to Bethenny Frankel???
Neither do I.
It was a blur.
And see those girls above our heads?
Don’t they look a little upset?
Because here is the thing, we were the only people in the audience that day to get a picture with her.
The more I look at it, I realize it is quite possibly the best photobomb ever.
Anyhow, this was all thanks to Jen who has guts and gumption the size of Dolly Parton’s weave.
No way would I have gotten a picture if I went alone.
Props to my bestie.
Mad, mad props.

Look at me! I'm on the Bethenny show! Word.
(This picture is for all of you. I love you.)
I look bloated because Mother Nature has a sense of humor.
She gave me my period in full blast on the plane ride home.
Heh heh.
Hudson Hotel Exterior NYC


An outside shot of the hotel they put us up in, The Hudson.
This is one cool place.
Hudson Hotel NYC

The restaurant right behind the registration desk is called Tequila Park and leads to an outdoor area.
This was so cool and had so many dope colors and textures that I put the picture in black and white so you could just enjoy how cool this is.
It looks like Pinterest hurled in here, doesn’t it?


Cool outdoor patio on top of Hudson Hotel NYC

The coolest bar I have ever seen.
Yes, those are books up there.


Cool library bar inside Hudson Hotel NYC

Hallway to the lobby.


Brick walls inside the Hudson Hotel

One last look at NYC from our room.

NYC skyline from hotel


NYC from the highway.
NYC from the highway

It was amazing.
It was the coolest experience.
I am so glad I got to share it with a dear friend.
And it was totally worth getting on a plane for.

The episode of Bethenny will air today, November 18th.
Check your local listings.
Stay tuned for part two of my NYC BABY!! post where I show you how NOT to be a tourist in NYC.
No, I don’t actually know how to do that.


18 thoughts on “NYC BABY!!! Bethenny Doesn’t Know Who The Hell I Am”

  1. I love that first picture of you and Jen. It shows your personalities so well. IDolly Parton's weave. You're funny . That's not where I thought you were going with that one.


  2. You are going to be famous!!! I have set my recording device (it's not a DVR, so who knows what they call it nowadays) and am ready to watch you two (three if your count Bethenny). Those girls behind you in the photo sure had their attitude showing. Didn't they know you were VIP's!


  3. I am so freaking jealous of you guys… because you look like you had a BLAST! And you both look AH-MA-ZING in your pictures. Even the homies one… can you please teach me how to NOT look like a dork in pictures?!Anyways, I'm jealous and I need friends who are famous so I can go to stuff like this. Know anyone at Nate Burkus because I love him and want to make out with his face. Just saying.


  4. I am crying from laughing so hard. I can't decide which picture is my favorite but the one from your ABC-7 debut is up there.Also, I LOVE experiencing NYC with newbies. It's so magical. Glad you two had so much fun! Off to share this. xo


  5. I could read your blog posts over and over again — and sometimes do 😀 When are you going to write a book, not kidding! You just Crack. Me. Up!!Now for the important stuff:Did you have the same DRIVER on the way back? Did you see how I worked that in there so you could use "your driver" in a sentence again? Glad you had so much fun!


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