SPOILER ALERT: If you have not seen the Gilmore Girls revival yet, do not, I REPEAT, DO NOT read this post.
Consider yourself warned.
Are they gone?
These were my exact words when the last THREE, not four words were uttered:
NOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU FU#$ING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!
I felt dazed, confused, angry, sad, emotionally unstable, nausea, upset, overwhelmed, did I mention nausea?
I didn’t at all get a feeling of resolution and nowhere in the past three days have I felt like, “Gee, that ending was exactly what I had in mind for my girls. Yep, it is well with my soul.”
NO, IT IS NOT.
I need closure from the closure. I need a revival from the revival. I need help.
Seriously, I really do.
We had friends coming to town literally one hour after I finished it and I felt like I might not be able to pull myself together in enough time.
I did, by the way. I know you were concerned.
So the next morning, I woke extra early, made some coffee, poured it into my Luke’s Diner mug and began to write notes on my phone.
I know I need professional help but I am not Emily Gilmore and I can’t afford it.
Therefore, you are my help, my proverbial “couch” to lay on and spit out a list of what I felt all through each season.
I NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT, OKAY?
If you don’t like the Gilmore Girls, I published a post about Dollar Tree Christmas tree ornaments today as well.
Go ahead and make your ornaments while we sit and have a GG inspired bitch session.
*these are in no random order because that is how my mind works. Welcome to my hell.
45 Thoughts About Gilmore girls: A Year in the Life
1- Kirk stole the show.
2- Miss Patty looked better overweight.
3- I didn’t get enough Babette time.
4- April is an annoying 22-year-old. Although, she was an annoying 14-year-old so nothing new there.
5- The majority of them look exactly the same! Kirk looks better. Taylor looks the same but he looked old in 2000 so…
6- I am in love with Emily this time around.
7- Logan is still kind of an ass.
8- The ending. THE ENDING.
9- I cried. Like, a lot.
10- The musical number was a time filler. Sorry, not interested. Would have rather seen Jess impregnate Rory. WHAT?
11- Speaking of musical numbers, that whole acid trip Rory and those awful boys (I know who they are, I won’t name them) were on? A waste of good Beatles music.
12- Have I mentioned the ending?
13- Rory writing the book? That was my all-time favorite part of the whole thing. And who pitched it? JESS OF COURSE. He knows her soul. Again, crying.
14- Now I want to read the book. Or did I?? Stop messing with my mind, Amy Sherman Palladino!
15- The ending was a little Roseann-ish / Newhart-esque. Where are my 80s’ and 90’s people? Don’t you think?
16- Sookie got five friggin’ minutes.
17- But their dialogue was so real. Like life REAL. Re-watch it to see what I mean. Cried there too.
18- I love Sookie but I only see Megan from Bridesmaids now and her Sookie voice is totally different.
19- I cried a lot. Like snot running down my face, blotchy red spots all over my upper regions CRIED.
20- It made me want to watch the series all over again. For the 200th time.
21- It made me miss the show all over again.
22- It made me want more. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE ENDING??
23- When Rory goes to Emily’s house to write and sees Richard? SOBBING AND BLOTCHY.
24- I miss Richard.
25- Did I mention crying?
26- Those weren’t four words.
27- Gypsy was Emily’s maid. Duh.
28- What was with Rory just popping up all the time. Were we in suspended animation as she made her eight-hour flight from London to Hartford?
29- Lorelai looks old and I mean that in the best possible way. She has aged and I love that. They didn’t make her look really young and I was afraid that would happen. She looked age appropriate.
30- Logan is too skinny.
31- And still an ass.
32- Dean got less time than Sookie but it was spent talking about his second wife and his children with lice. Being an adult sucks, doesn’t it Dean Forester?
33- Caesar’s hair looks like a bad Peter Brady 70’s perm.
34- Michel looks exactly the same; maybe he was in suspended animation too.
35- “This isn’t an office, it’s a diner. Go home” should have been the last four words. Or nine. Whatever.
36- Hep Alien squeezed in at a weird moment kind of sucked. The only way it would have been weirder is if they played in the background while Jess impregnated Rory. Nope, it was still weirder.
37- Zach. Dude, you kind of look like shit.
38- I needed less
cowbell tambourine and more Mrs. Kim.
39- Brian proves that nerds don’t age so get yourself a nerd. Stat.
40- “It’s in an envelope labeled body shipping cash” is my favorite line.
41- I never thought Emily Gilmore would give me my favorite line.
42- Dolly Parton singing “Here You Come Again” proved that GG is my soul mate.
43-That Naomi Shropshire chick was a waste of all of our time. WHY DID I SEE HER MORE THAN MRS. KIM? OR BABETTE????
44- The letter Emily received on her birthday? What the actual hell Amy and Daniel Palladino? Why did we need a Naomi Shropshire wasting our time when the letter is just dangling??
45- Speaking of dangling, THE ENDING???
It was exactly how I hoped it would be. I was a little worried that we were building it up too much but it was perfect. It felt like we never left and now I want more.
How are all of you coping?
WHAT? IT’S-A THING, OKAY???