Recently, I decided that in addition to making me better on the inside via therapy, I also wanted to find a new doctor.
I liked my old doctor but it was near impossible to get in for an appointment, their email system was awful, and honestly, she was a pill pusher.
Every time I went in for something, it was ten minutes of talk, five minutes of examination, and two to three medication scripts,
I felt empty every time I would walk out of her office complex.
I needed a change.
I should clarify that I wasn’t looking for a holistic doctor, not that there isn’t anything wrong with that. I wanted a doctor who would prescribe me antibiotics if I had strep throat, not put me on a course of vitamins and essential oils.
Don’t get me wrong, I love oils, I just don’t think they will heal me if I am dying.
So I found an Integrative Medicine doctor group near me that treats ALL of you instead of just the symptoms. Essentially get down to the nitty-gritty and really find out what the hell is wrong with you.
In my case, it was migraines and weight gain.
I am aware that I am in menopause and those are symptoms, but something just seemed off.
I would try diets and nothing would work beyond a week. My low carb lifestyle was just eh because I would get bored after two weeks and then hit a stall in weight loss. And I just felt meh all the damn time.
I know menopause sucks but this was way beyond menopause suckage.
So I went to the new doctor in early June, fell in love with the soft zen music in the lobby, the smell of essential oils wafting through the hallways as opposed to rubbing alcohol, and the time the doctor spent with me.
My new doctor spent a total of 45 minutes listening to me and occasionally chirping in.
I have never had a doctor spend that kind of time with me.
She listened, gathered information, and told me that they needed to do a complete blood panel the following week after a 12 hour fast.
A “million dollar workup” of all sorts of shit that might be running through my body.
I don’t think I have ever had six vials of blood ever taken from my body.
Two weeks after the blood was drawn, I went back to my doctor and they leveled with me.
It’s not just menopause making me feel like shit, I got literal shit goin’ down in my veins.
I had elevated levels of cholesterol, something I had never had before in my life.
I had a high glucose count, that along with several other numbers pointed to pre-diabetes.
And the scariest of all was that I had what they called high levels of “sticky cholesterol”; a silent but deadly cholesterol.
I was told that I needed to go on a low carb diet STAT. I needed to do strength exercises STAT. I needed to take a daily fish oil supplement STAT. I had to lower my doses of Naproxen each month so I could take a daily baby aspirin STAT.
Okay, maybe I added in the STAT but they told me in no uncertain terms that it was a good thing I got my ass in there (my words, not theirs) because I was headed down an ugly road.
Apparently, this sticky cholesterol is genetic along with another thing in my blood: I have high levels of something called Leptin resistance.
Which is described best here:
Eat more, gain body fat.
More body fat means more leptin in fat cells.
Too much fat means that proper leptin signaling is disrupted.
The brain thinks you’re starving, which makes you want to eat more.
You get fatter. And hungrier.
You eat more. Gain more fat.
And so on.
Courtesy of precisionnutrition.com
Don’t come at me with medical jargon, but all I know is that for the first time in my life I felt validated.
I am always fucking hungry.
I know you are saying ME TOO and I’m gonna stop you right there.
I am always gonna be hungrier than you.
But to find out it’s in my blood, made me so happy.
I was born to eat, people!!!!
Sorry, it was getting way too serious in here.
So you’re gonna get a kick out of this.
I currently am not allowed to take the daily baby aspirin to help with the sticky cholesterol.
Why you ask?
Because, as you know, I get migraines and because of said migrainage was told to take naproxen for pain alongside my migraine medication on an as-needed basis when they occur.
Backstory– my old doctor and my current neurologist both suggested in November that I stop taking Advil and Tylenol for headaches because they were causing rebound headaches in me, so I haven’t taken either of them since then.
Therefore, I take naproxen in place of the Advil and Tylenol I used to take for pain. I haven’t had a rebound headache cycle in that time, I am doing better with my migraines, and all is right with the world.
I don’t have as many headaches, and I probably take naproxen a total of four times per month. But if I am having a really bad migraine month, it could be more.
When this current doctor talked to me, she asked what I take for migraine pain (as needed, of course). I told her all of the above and she said, well, that’s a problem.
Why you ask?
Because naproxen AND daily baby aspirin can rip the lining of your stomach.
DID YOU GET THAT? Rip. The. Lining. Of. Your. Stomach.
Oh, it gets better.
She then said that if I take more than five naproxen a month, I can’t take the baby aspirin.
Umm, I never know how much naproxen I will take in a month because my migraines are unpredictable.
Some months I could have one migraine, others I could have ten.
I then told her that if I could predict how much naproxen I will need or how many migraines I will have in a month, I’d be richer than her.
She had no answer for me other than to reduce my naproxen each month. Essentially, control how much pain I feel each month.
It was at this point that I thought my migraines could literally kill me.
And then I did the most unexpected thing: I laughed.
And laughed again.
So this is where I am at now.
Kind of in limbo.
Of trying not to get headaches, shopping for dorms, working from home and dealing with lots of other fun life issues.
While not medicating my non-resistant leptins with carbohydrates.
What the bloody hell.
I wish I had never gotten the damn blood test, to begin with.
They call it a silent killer for a reason.