Stupid meaning I hate it, not stupid meaning why create one?
I spent an unreasonable amount of time a few months ago trying to revamp my Who I Am page on this blog. Spending time that I don’t really have attempting to impress strangers who have just started reading my blog.
The first place I go to on a new-to-me blog is their Who I Am, About Me, Meet ME! page. Because I want to know who I’m reading about, what their story is, why they’re writing, etc..
So, in my opinion, the About Me page is the most important part of a blog.
By the way, if you’re new to blogging, don’t look for blog bio examples on Pinterest. Because you’ll be inundated with blogs that have orgasmic bio pages and blogging résumés that will make you feel like you’re not living your best bloggy life.
Did you know that some bloggers have appeared on the Today Show? Or have written for the New York Times? Or have taken the free blogger Disney Cruise at least 20 times?
At that point, you should stop calling yourself a blogger because you’re ruining it for underachievers like myself. I have a reputation to uphold.
I also have friends in high places. Or friends who are high.
But I persevered because I, too, have credentials.
Like writing a post for Johnsonville Sausages. Sausages that I ate even after they had been underneath the dishwasher. And then I told my entire audience about it in detail in the sponsored post that I was paid to write.
Or, four years ago, writing twice a month for Chicago Parent and pouring my heart and soul into every single post. They have since removed my posts from the site since apparently four years is like, EONS in the literary world. So there is no evidence that I ever wrote there.
Oh, and I had an article published on the Scary Mommy website four years ago, but no one remembers because having your work published on other people’s websites is so 2014.
Then it occurred to me: four years ago, I was living my best life in terms of blogging.
So, how do I inform all of the people who are new to my blog why they should be reading it when my best blog life was lived four years ago?
Here are a couple ideas I toyed with:
Half-assing blogging is a real thing.
Trust me, I know a thing or two about that.
I might even trademark the word half-assery.
OMG, THAT WOULD MAKE AN AMAZING BLOG NAME!
I feel like I’ve left something out.
I also like chicken salad.
Girly hormonal shit was my second pick for a blog name. I might still use it someday, so don’t take it.
You know what? I don’t want to make a bio anymore. I’m bored.
Let’s go eat some chicken salad.