Blogging, Life

“Love Where You’re At”

I am not sure if that phrase is copyrighted or whatever the hell word I should be using there but “love where you’re at” has spoken to me for a long time now.

In fact, it’s on one of my felt boards in my house this month in honor of my birthday month:

 

Buddy is NOT feeling this post. One of my friends changed it to LOVE YOU WHORE when she was over a few weeks ago and I kind of loved that but I have an impressionable 11-year-old so……

 

I made sure to google the quote so that I didn’t step on toes when titling this post and found this gem of a song:

 

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“And the best part of learning is just loving where you’re at”. 

 

It’s taken me a very long time to get here, loving where I’m at.

Of course, I am not completely evolved yet but through my journey (aka this thing called life, thank you Prince), I have become much more aware of how little I was truly loving my life simply by wishing for things I didn’t have.

I wish I lived where it was warmer.

I wish we had more money.

I wish I was thinner. 

I feel like, for a very long time, I was trying to attain something that might possibly never happen.

I wasn’t at all in love with where I was but rather waiting for the next thing to come.

And when the next thing came, THEN I would be fulfilled.

 

 

In this week’s edition of, it’s my birthday month so let’s pick topics out of a hat, I will be tackling the following prompts:

What place do you consider your home; my life story in five sentences; and how would you like to be described. 

 

Courtesy of Pinterest

 

What place do you consider home

So the reason I bring up loving where you’re at is that, for a very, very long period of time, I didn’t really like where I currently live.

I was constantly on Realtor.com looking for new homes, googling search terms like “best places to live with a family”, “most affordable places to live”.

But I could never pinpoint why I didn’t really like it here.

I mean, there are downsides to living in the state I live: highest taxes known to man, the winters are pretty horrible (can you say snow in April?), and home prices are kind of stupid for what you get.

But aren’t there downsides to everywhere?

Here’s the thing, it’s home. In fact, it’s been the longest I have ever lived in one home, coming in at 14 years this summer.

And you know what? I really love this home. So much so that whenever we talk about winning the lottery, I always say I would pay to physically move this house somewhere warmer to which my husband says, MY GOD, I WILL BUILD YOU A HOME JUST LIKE THIS ONE.

To which I say, but what about this wall???

 

growth chart
We have measured our girls on this wall since Anna was five years old.

 

I also love the community we have created in our little “city”. We have neighbors who walk into the house like they live here (I love that), kids friends who know our garage code and let themselves in, I love that we can walk to the movie theater or the grocery store or restaurant, that we have two big-box grocery stores within a five-minute radius, that we can be in downtown Chicago in less than 45 minutes and in the country riding horses in less than 20 minutes.

Then I noticed something; the more I focused on the good about where I live, the more I kind of loved it.

 

Courtesy of katsdailyinspiration.blogspot.com

 

My life story in five sentences (aka- my life in numbers)

 

I was born and raised in Ohio until the age of 19 when I moved to Illinois, where I started working full-time in retail instead of going to college.

After five years, I realized retail wasn’t my passion so I started night school college at the age of 24.

I got married to the wrong guy (whom I met working in retail) at the age of 25; became a mommy for the first time at the age of 29, and subsequently, got divorced at the age of 33.

I married the right guy (whom I met at the age of 23) at the age of 36 and became a mommy for the second time at the age of 37, which also happens to be the same age when I graduated from college (she was in my belly, unbeknownst to me, as I walked up to the stage to get my diploma).

I finally found my real passion (writing) at age 39 years old.

 

How would you like to be described

“She was the real deal”

Also: 

“Wasn’t she that chick who was obsessed with John Hughes and made the funny-as-hell movie about a caravan from Los Angeles to Chicago. Hey, whatever happened to that movie? Maybe it’s on Amazon”

 

28 thoughts on ““Love Where You’re At””

  1. You are the real deal. Also I love this post. Something about loving what you’ve built and being content with it reminds me to do the same.

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  2. Getting to read two posts here in one day because I am behind (or clueless, or both)- anyway, what a treat!

    I am always impressed by people who follow their own path vs doing the same thing as everyone else . . . ie: working first, then college. Sounds like quite a journey. So glad you found Mr. Right. I get the feeling that you are the real deal. I am curious where you are in Illinois? I am in western burbs. I consider western burbs of Chicago where I am from. Have lived other places, like northern burbs (so exciting) and out of state as a kid, but I love where I live. I love my house and my location and a few select neighbors- but I do win the boobie prize for having some of the worst neighbors EVER. I would like to be described as ‘funny and had a story for everything’ which I think is pretty accurate. I mean I guess it would be nice to be described as the kindest and most giving person EVER, but I am over it. Not thst I am unkind, but my humor and my stories are more my thing, if I’m being honest. Again with the long comment!

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      1. Well, I moved from the western burbs in high school to Libertyville. Then came back to the western burbs when I was out of college. So, not really all that continental. More like: hey we’re moving kids. BTW, Coach emailed me from work today. ‘They are opening a new PT clinic (the company he works for) in Arizona. Wanna move?’ I emailed back: Sure.

        Neither one of us was serious. I think. – ? Oh but the weather!

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  3. I love that we are riding some of the same waves at the same time. I have recently been thinking a lot about happiness and what it means to be happy where I am. I always tell the story about how I have it all: the two amazing kids (boy and girl), the big house with a pool, living in the state of CT, and working a job that pays me well enough to support all of that. But I focus on the bad: the taxes, the fact that my job is not my dream job, the troubles at home.

    When I was in college, I did a documentary with my geology teacher about a coal mining town, called Centralia, in PA. The town had been on fire, underground, for years. During the filming, we were able to go down into two different coal mines, and you know what? Nothing I do is as hard as being down there in those mines. Whenever I get down about my job, I remember those men, faces and clothing dirty, fathers and sons working together because it was all they ever knew, and they worked hard. My job has never been, and will never be that hard. I am so darn fortunate.

    I know it’s a bit extreme, but when we look at what we have over what others don’t have, it’s astounding that we can be upset about any of it. I am so grateful as often as I can be. And when I fall into the trap of the things I don’t have, I try to remember that gratefulness.

    Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!!!

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    1. I literally just commented on your blog three minutes ago about being on the same wavelength and it is scary how we aren’t twins.
      Quick! Where were you on the afternoon of April 28th, 1970???

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  4. I married the wrong guy, too. Twice. (Not the wrong guy twice, but two wrong guys. Or, maybe the first one wasn’t wrong and I was just dumb, the but second one REALLY was.) In my family we call these practice marriages. Not everyone has had one, but enough of us have. You would so fit in with my family of women.

    And as for the loving where you live/are thing: Yeah. I had been having a lot of trouble with that, and then suddenly I wasn’t. I don’t know that it’s something you can force or accomplish through will. But isn’t it nice to be able to pay more attention to what’s working for you than what isn’t? Like you said, I think I had to let go of some ideas about how things were supposed to be. Again, not something I think can be forced. Things happen when they do. I tried to make it happen through logic and reason, but that didn’t get me anywhere.

    Sure am enjoying your birthday month prompts.

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  5. Love this! It is so easy to find things we don’t like about our lives or our situation but I too find that if I change my mindset it eventually turns my whole outlook around (not that it always lasts as I, like everyone, goes through little funks now and then).

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  6. Some days, it’s really hard to love where I’m at (physically and mentally). I tend to think ahead to the next thing or to getting past such-and-such instead of living in the moment. I’m in a funk right now (and I also have a massive infected stye on my eye so I look like a freaking Cyclops) so I don’t have much more to say…except that I loved this post. But then again, I love ALL your posts. xoxo

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  7. You know, my theme is this year is ‘fake it till you make it’ but that’s only referencing confidence. If I didn’t fake putting on big girl panties to face the world, I’d just hide instead. But Love Where You’re At is a beautiful phrase. Instead of always wanting more more more and never finding the gratifying balance of growth and yet being satisfied with yourself.

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    1. It’s funny you referencing that to confidence because my self-esteem is in the toilet most days and you’re right to faking it until you got this. So that I agree with. 🙂

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  8. I’m still struggling to make this happen on many levels but I admire you for tackling it and living it! I’ve tried faking it and never made it so they can officially retire that theory…doesn’t work. Now I’m laughing because God has a sense of humor…my 30 minute “move alarm” just went off as I typed that which is the first bar of “Funkytown” by Lipps Inc and 90% of the time, I snooze it. Point proven…can’t fake it til you make it when the snooze button is all too alluring.

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  9. Love this post!

    I repeat to myself daily, “Every moment is perfect.”

    When I first started, it really helped me to let go of wanting things to be different. And now it just makes me smile as a reminder that the Universe is giving me exactly what I need, I just sometimes need to have some faith and look more closely.

    This perspective of gratitude goes a long way to helping you really enjoy your life. As it is!

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    1. YES! My therapist and I had a discussion about living in the moment and how I don’t know if I am doing it right. She laughed and said that even drinking a cup of coffee and looking at your phone first thing is living in the moment. Long story but let’s just say it has changed how I look at everything. 🙂

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