In 2016, I wrote about band names if I ever were to start a rock band. I even came up with cool graphics.
Since then, I have kept a note in my phone of more kickass band names. Some of you keep Christmas lists and things you want to buy on Amazon in your phone notes section, I keep those too. But I also keep nonsensical lists too, like names for bands I will never start.
You have NO idea how therapeutic this was to create this post as well as creating album covers for bands that will never exist.
Looking to start a mid-life crisis band during a pandemic? I got you, boo.
Dirty Horse
Backstory-when Ellie was riding horses with her best friend at their old barn, her friend’s little brother was talking about a horse in the barn that happened to be very dirty. But the way he said it sounded like, “dirty whoresssss” which, by the way, would make an even more excellent band name.
Broken Taco
We had friends over for dinner last fall (ahh, remember those days?) and we had, you guessed it, tacos for dinner. But the shells were extra crumbly and we joked all night about how we had broken tacos for dinner.
You had to be there.
Invisible Handcuffs
A friend told me the story of how the kids at her son’s school have to walk down the hallways of the school with their hands behind their backs so that they don’t touch other people.
Anyway, she mentioned how they look like they were wearing invisible handcuffs and we laughed and laughed and laughed.
Twisted Nipple
I don’t remember how I thought of this but it is good, no? A soft metal band?

Busted Rolo

Feeling Bad for Lindsay Lohan
No clue where I came up with this one but it is a great alternative band name, no?
Facts That Aren’t True
This might have been one we came up with while playing Cards Against Humanity with friends?
Panty Butter

Broken Drawers
I mentioned this would make an excellent band name in the post I wrote about my new green nightstands.
See? I do remember some stuff.
Disco Biscuit
I was sharing a meme with a friend last month that had the word quaalude in it and she mentioned she didn’t know what exactly a quaalude was. I laughed at her not knowing and then came to realize that I didn’t even really know exactly what a quaalude was either.
It is a sedative and it was given frequently to people in the 70s and 80s to relax. It also has the nickname disco biscuit which I immediately squealed with joy when I heard because BAND NAME!!
Disco Biscuit is my all-time favorite band. HOW DID YOU KNOW? 😊
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I have a pulse on what my friends like. 😉
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You have a gift. I like Busted Rolo and Twisted Nipple as a runner up- I cannot say that one without wincing though.
May I suggest The Biting Savages: steer clear, or Crappy Neighbors: don’t knock, we’re not home.
I have a weird phone pic that I took by accident of Tank from a weird angle: phone in my lap facing up and Tank partially looming super tall in front of a ceiling lamp, complete with weird lighting/shadows. I am saving it because it will make a perfect album cover should any of my Irish musicians record an album. 😉
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CRAPPY NEIGHBORS, yessss. That is a good one.
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Other than panty butter I like all of these; very creative.
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LOL. To be clear, I don’t like panty butter either. 😉
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THESE ARE EPIC. ❤️❤️
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Haha! Thank you!
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So many of these made me laugh. Ok. ALL of them made me laugh; you are too clever and I love how your brain works!
Lindsay Lohan would love to have a band named after her.
And panty butter? I can’t NOT get that out of my head. Can.not.
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I feel like she would. I also feel like she gets the “aren’t you Emma Stone?” comment a lot too.
Yeah, the sick person who searched “panty butter” on my blog needs to be in jail.
But their album will go to number one.
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#1. LOL
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I love all of these but Disco Biscuit is my fave.
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Mine too. 🙂
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These names are very funny yet I can see them at the local club. What a fun idea making lists of names up for a never to be band or the household pet we are all highly allergic to, the list goes on and on. 🙂
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Aww, I am glad you liked it! I can totally see Twisted Nipple on the marquee. 😉
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OK, I know this is about the band names, BUT: It’s the whole thing! The cover art and the album titles and how many freaking hours did you spend on this? Because this shit doesn’t just make itself. I want to acknowledge the full extent of your gift here. The Lindsay Lohan one is genius.
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I LOVE YOU.
Also, thank you. ❤️
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How are you not famous yet? Seriously. You are so creative! Loved all of these and I would buy their albums. All of them.
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RIGHT?? Where is my reality tv show?? 😂
I’m glad you can appreciate my warped humor. ❤️
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You’re so funny! First time visiting your blog and I have a feeling I am going to love it here!
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Welcome! I hope you enjoy your stay here. ❤️
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