Birds, Family, Life, Pets

The Year that Joy Went Out the Window

Kari

Yesterday afternoon, our bird, Joy, flew out the patio door. It was all a fluke. My husband was cleaning the patio, while I had her out of her cage, watching a video and talking to her. I went into the kitchen to get something, and she followed me.

However, when she flew to follow me, she continued flying, going out the window and flying away.

After that, we couldn’t find her.

Joy, my tiny writing companion, has helped me get through this pandemic so far, keeping me company during this dreadful time.

We are keeping her cage on the patio, as instructed by the pet experts, in the hopes of luring her home. Also, the yellow water is her vitamin water, not urine or dirty water. By the way, birds do not urinate. Their urea is in their poop. (Thanks to my cousin, who is a science teacher, for that cool tip.)

For the past 18 hours, I’ve been crying on and off, walking to the window whenever I hear a bird chirp, and running to the door when I see a lighter- colored bird fly by. I open the front door, expecting her to come in.

WHAT AM I DOING?

It’s been such a difficult year overall, but we’ve also lost two pets.

Nibbles in February, Lucy in June, and now Joy in July.

Ella is beside herself, bless her heart. Last night, she cried about how worried she was about Joy’s first night away from her family, and I sobbed, and we both sobbed some more, and sat outside with the mosquitos, calling for Joy until we couldn’t stay outside any longer.

My mom and dad were over when Joy escaped; we hadn’t seen them in months due to social distancing, and they had to witness everything. They purchased Joy for Ella as a Christmas gift. My dad told my mom on the way home that if Joy never returns home, they will get another bird for us, they were also in love with her.

It’s not that we all want to replace Joy; it’s that she brought us all joy during such a joyless time in our lives.

When I called my mom every afternoon, Joy would hear her voice and join us in the conversation.

When I left the room while writing across from her, she tweeted for me, as if to say “Where are you? “Where did you go?” She was looking for me, searching for me.

Is she searching for me now?

This is where I’ve been sitting every morning for the past two months as I began writing my book. Joy’s cage used to be on the yellow cabinet.

I sat down this morning and felt profound emptiness.

There is no more Joy in this room.

Literally and figuratively.

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30 thoughts on “The Year that Joy Went Out the Window”

  2. Oh Kari,
    My heart breaks for you all. Your family doesn’t deserve this. This isn’t a test. Just a fluke.
    Let’s pray she finds her way back to her real mama-you. ❤️
    Sending you all love.

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  3. I am so sad for all of you. Can you leave a pieceof your clothing out? I know that helps for dogs, not sure about birds? ❤️You all!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am too. My mom said she read that they can find their way home up to weeks later. It’s been shared over 100 times on a local site so I hope someone has spotted her. My fear is that she has died but I just want her not to have suffered.

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  6. Damn, Kari. It HAS been a shitty year. I wish I could write some words to make it better, but I know there aren’t any. Sometimes there is no larger meaning, no Why at the root of what happens. I’m so sorry the Wheel of Random Fortune landed on this spoke, and I hope you find your Joy (literal and metaphorical) soon.

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  9. This had to be a tough one to write. It is incredibly hard to lose pets and I miss them many years after they are gone. Unless you have loved and lost a bird you truly have no idea how they enhance your life. Hoping for the best possible results for you.

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    1. So my mom has an interesting perspective. Joy loved hearing birds singing on YouTube and looked for them on my phone as if to join them and she was doing just that when I was walking into the kitchen and she flew away. My mom said maybe, even though she adored us, was always longing to fly free with the birds. That makes my heart happy if true and I am trying to remain positive. If she is meant to be with us, she will end up with us and that is how I believe the Universe works. SIGH. But it still hurts my heart no matter what. :)

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  11. Kari, my heart breaks for you and your family. I am so sorry. I was praying last night for Joy to come home and if not, for her to be happy and safe in the trees and sunshine and flying through the beautiful skies.

    xoxo

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    1. I love that last part. So much. Maybe she’s meant to be free and with her bird friends. Happy in the sunshine. I hope that for her. I miss her sounds so much and I’ve cried more than I’d like to admit for a bird. I just want to know she’s okay. ❤️

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  12. I really hope she comes back soon or she finds her own joy in the sunshine! When I was young, my parakeet died when I was in Pakistan…I think she waited until I was gone so I wouldn’t have to find her body and cry, but it was hard returning to the home and not getting one more chirp.

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    1. Aww I’m so sorry. When you live in the country, dogs go away to die, so that’s similar.

      I did think that maybe she went away for a reason. But I miss her so much. For such a little life, her presence is so missed.

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  13. Oh my gosh, I am so very sorry. I know how much she meant to you. I hope she finds her way back to you. Pets mean ever that much more now that we’ve had to lean on them for support in this lonely time. Sending you so much love.

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  15. I figured since I as already crying I would finally read this…I still have nothing intelligent to say beyond how sorry I am

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    1. Aww, thank you friend. I still miss her. Buddy and I were sitting outside today and heard an unusual bird singing in the tree and looked for her. I suspect I’ll always look for her. ❤️

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