Favorite Things, Life, What I Kept

What I Kept – June 2026

Kari

I began writing this series in May of 2022, not intending to make it a tradition. But it stayed—and so did you. Thank you for showing up each month.

We still see gray Honda Pilots every single day. Saw this one parked behind me at a doctor’s appointment and had to smile.
His Biscuit looks a lot like our Biscuits.
source

I was waiting for Ella to finish summer school one day and parked in this lot near her school. Back when she was a freshman, she only had one summer school class, and since the school wasn’t close to home, I would sit here and wait to pick her up.

Four years ago, I used to see this man riding his bike around this parking lot. For some reason, it always brought me so much joy during that season of life.

On this day, I was on the phone with my mom when I looked up and saw him pulling his bike out of the back of his pickup truck.

He’s still doing it!

The little things.

My mom and I both track Anna’s flights on the Flighty app. She loves knowing we’re both following along.

I have this little mental thing I do where I imagine myself wrapped in bubble wrap to protect me from certain situations.

I actually told Anna and Ella about this recently in two completely different situations that were stressing them out: Imagine you’re wrapped in bubble wrap.

Then a day later this commercial came on and I laughed so hard.

One of our many yard squirrels
I had a dream about my dad, the first in a long time.
I woke up and wrote this in my phone (without glasses on) at 1:24 am.
My dear friend Melanie took this picture of Buddy 💜
Anna and her best friend at Ella’s graduation celebration 💜

We had a small gathering to celebrate Ella’s graduation, and I only took a few pictures. I realized later, talking with a few people, that I have almost none from Anna’s graduation party either. It turns out when you’re the unofficial family photographer, and your phone is commandeered for the photo montage playing on a loop in the family room, you end up just being there instead.

Mike and I were present for this one in a way I’m not sure we fully were for Anna’s. We were just different people then. Younger, more distracted by the weight of everything we were carrying. Eight years changes you. Life changes you.

And there’s something about knowing this is the last time we’ll do this — the graduation party, the photo montage, the disposable plates and backyard chairs — that made us pay attention differently. It feels like we can finally exhale.

The unofficial family photographer, photographed.
Mike took this on vacation years ago without me knowing.
This one means so much to me.

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45 thoughts on “What I Kept – June 2026”

  1. Aw, I love that last photo! So sweet. I am in hardly any of our family photos and I too am our photographer so I am mostly behind the camera at our functions but find it really hard to take many photos while also being the host so the parties we have at home tends to be the ones I have the fewest photos of even though they are the most important to me. That’s just how it goes. I LOVED putting together Alec’s photo montage and was kind of bummed not to get to do the same for Evan… or Ian. I mean I could have but I don’t think anyone would have really bothered to sit through it but Alec’s high school friends had a BALL with his (I did make sure to get approval for photos before including them). I love that flight tracking app. Look how much she’s traveled already!!

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    1. I really appreciate this. There’s such a real tension between being present and documenting everything, especially when you’re hosting at home—it makes sense those are the moments with the fewest photos.

      I love that you made the montage for Alec. Those kinds of things end up meaning so much, even if they don’t always happen the same way for each child.

      And yes, that flight app is so fun to watch. It’s amazing how much she’s already traveled. 💜✈️🌍

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  2. As always, you share so many meaningful snippets that I have a hard time commenting. I can only think of what I want to say about the last ones, but maybe the earlier ones hit me hardest? There are so many, it’s difficult to remember once I’m in the comments box.

    I looked up your post about your dad’s car. I miss the car I had before we hit the road, and I swear it’s the most popular car in the city where I live now. But, seeing a dozen every day hasn’t taken from me the feeling of freedom I had in that car.

    I also thought for a while about you being the family photographer. What that means for your family and what it means for you, to see them through your lens and so rarely to see yourself. My ex was our family photographer, and I was always so angry at how often he was in our faces taking pictures instead of helping out. I’m still angry, ha! But of course grateful for the pictures. I’ll be sure to send him more that I find of him and our son together.

    I’d forgotten how much I enjoy sitting in our hammock. We don’t have good trees for that in our new yard, but I could buy a hammock stand like your daughter and her friend are in. I’m going to do that right now.

    Sorry to fill up my comment box with stuff about myself. But that’s what your mindful writing does for me: make me think. About myself yes! But I’m thinking. Thank you.

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    1. I so appreciate you taking the time to sit with all of it like this.

      What you said about your car is so interesting. It’s funny how objects like that can hold onto feeling even when they’re everywhere around us. It sounds like yours still carries that sense of freedom, which feels really important.

      And I completely get what you said about being the family photographer. There’s something complicated in that role—wanting to preserve everything, and then realizing you’re often outside of it. I’m still figuring out how to shift that balance.

      Also, I love that this made you want to bring the hammock back into your life. This makes me so happy.

      And please don’t apologize for reflecting on yourself—that’s kind of the whole point of writing like this. 😘💜🌈

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      1. Re: the family photographer, I don’t see that person as outside of the family action at all. I see that person more as a driver of the action. I’m not just talking about asking people to pose, but to stop and become aware that they’re in a photographable moment, more like. The observer is affecting what’s observed here in a big, positive way.

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      2. Oh, I love this. I hadn’t thought about it that way at all. You’re right—the photographer isn’t just documenting the moment but helping people notice it while it’s happening. That’s such a beautiful way to look at it. I still need to remember to hand the camera to someone else once in a while, but you’ve definitely given me a new perspective on the role I’ve been playing all these years. 💜

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  3. Though it’s nice to have photographs of big events, there’s a lot to be said for simply being there instead of documenting every last moment to death.

    Great photo of you and the girls. I wonder what you were talking about? Totally looks like one of those “the one that got away” moments to me!

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    1. I agree 100 percent.

      I remember! Ella wanted to order a foot-long hot dog, and I was trying to explain (and maybe exaggerate a little) how much hot dog that actually was. 😊

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  4. It’s important for the family photographer to be in some photos. There are too few of my dad for this very reason.

    I love the Japanese version of menopause. I’m revising crone – there are implications – and adopting konenki.

    I love a good goose, and a graduating goose is a good one.

    I’ve also found I’ve become more present and more invested in participating in milestone events than I was when I was younger. It really does take the brain quite some time to reach adult/mature. The body gets there a lot sooner.

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    1. Someone else said that about their dad too. My dad was in a lot of photos, and Mike is too, but I’m not. I’m hoping to remedy that.

      I hope so too!

      And now the goose clearly needs a summer outfit…

      I think losing my dad changed this for me too. His absence has made me realize how lucky we are to get to be here for these milestone moments in the first place. I know you understand this too. 😘💜

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  6. Love the bubble wrap visualization. Definitely using it. Also love the picture of the cake with the lights in the backyard! I’d buy a copy of it. It’s sparkly – I imagine every time I’d look at it I would feel happy. And of course the candid picture of you with your daughters is special too. XO

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    1. Our backyard looks so magical this year. Ella wanted extra lights up for her party, so we added more. My mom said it felt so cozy and special when we sat out there that night. 💜

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  7. The last photo – of you – is lovely. It’s just what I think you’d be, but somehow captured in a particular photo. Also lovely, the poem If I Carry My Father, the pups. As last time, all of it. 😊💜

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    1. Aww, thank you, my friend. That photo is so lovely and it really captured a moment. I still remember that day so well, and I think it’s partly because of that photo. 💜

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  8. So many lovely things, Kari! What you wrote on your phone after your dream was amazing. That really resonated with me. I love the idea of menopause as renewal. It’s wonderful that you can track Anna’s flights on the app. Technology does have some awesome aspects. I will definitely imagine myself wrapped in bubble wrap the next time I get stressed!

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  9. Those drowsy pups! Isn’t it comforting (and also frustrating) how our pets can simply lie down and sleep so restfully in peace and security? They awaken to the same life they left momentarily, refreshed and happy.

    When my siblings, my mother, and I went through our family’s photos, searching for ones of my father for his memorial, it was a very difficult task. He hated being photographed. So many of the photos were taken by him, using one of those old-fashioned cameras with the accordion pleats to focus the lens. I decided then and there to stop letting my own insecurities prevent my sons from having photos of me, whether to be enjoyed now or later after I’m gone. It’s not easy, but like most parents, I’d do anything for my kids.

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    1. Oh, to be a dog in a safe and loving home, right?

      Your dad sounds a little like me, and maybe a little like you, too. I agree, my friend. I’m trying to get over my insecurities as well. I used to take daily selfies before my dad died, but I stopped doing that a while ago.

      I’d like to get into the picture more with my family and friends. Maybe this is my sign to start doing that. 💜

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      1. Yes, please! It’s entered my mind a few times that I don’t have any photos on my phone of you…or me and you. Booo! Let’s remedy that! I will not post them on social media or anything. They’ll be just for me. I might print one out for one of my art journals (private) though, if that’s OK. :-)

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  10. I love that you’re still seeing gray Honda Pilots. And that you dreamed of your dad (and typed out what you dreamed right away). You could also keep a pen & paper at your bedside & use that in the middle of the night if you don’t want the light from your phone. The poem “If I Carry My Father”…beautiful.

    The photo of Biscuits leaning on Ella’s back…love. And, of course, the precious pic of Buddy. I’m so glad he was looking at me like that with his beautiful lemur eyes.

    Visualizing wrapping yourself in bubble wrap…that is so good! I’ll have to remember that one. I’ve also heard you can visualize yourself surrounded in white (healing) light.

    I adore that you and your mom track Anna’s flights!

    The photo of you and the girls that Mike took…not only is it heartwarming, but you look so much like your mom in this photo. I saw it immediately. <3

    xoxo

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    1. I love that we see them too. Mike sees them every day as well and always sends me pictures.

      I love the pictures you took of Buddy. I still have the one you took of Buddy and Biscuits sitting together in the kitchen chair on our fridge. 💜

      Yes! I use the white light too.

      I always make sure she’s at her hotel before I go to bed—or at least I try to. Sometimes she gets in really late. It’s so much fun watching her fly all over the globe. It feels like we’re traveling with her. 🌍✈️

      Oh, I love that! 😘💜

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  11. I love that Japanese translation of menopause, and I feel like that is really descriptive of my own experience – and yours as well. Although I guess I am technically perimenopausal, as I do still get Aunt Flo visiting. But I do love that feeling of starting a new journey! It does feel like a renewal.

    I love that photo of you. It is so important for the photographer to be photographed. I read an article once about a woman who was grieving her mother, who was not only the family photographer, but she was also not confident in her looks and didn’t want to be photographed ever. She was always insecure about her weight and her hair was never right, and she had the wrong outfit…you get the idea. Or – thematically – the picture. Anyway, this woman who was grieving her mother was also grieving the fact that she had hardly any photos of her. It struck me as so, so sad. My husband takes a lot of our photos but I make a real effort to take pictures of him. Not that he’s not confident in his looks, but he’s just often taking the photos, so he’s sometimes not in the photos. I try to photograph him every opportunity I have!

    I love that you are tracking Anna’s flights, and all the congratulations to Ella and to you and Mike on her graduation!

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    1. I love it too! I’ve got so much more compassion for women on this side of menopause, mostly because I no longer have periods to contend with. When I hear women talking about dealing with them, I’m reminded of how much life energy they took for so many years. We really are incredible beings, if you ask me. 😘💜

      Oh gosh, this woman could be me. I love life so much, but I hate having my picture taken. I hope that discomfort continues to fade as I get older. I truly love being in the photos once they exist, but I’m rarely comfortable while they’re being taken. Maybe that’s why there aren’t many photos of me anymore… maybe that’s the energy I’m putting out into the world.

      Thank you, my friend. May and June were really wonderful months for our family. 💜✈️🌍

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  12. I sometimes visualize myself covered with a white sheet, like a poncho?… during hard situations or difficult meetings. Or hard conversations… like a protection layer.

    I do my best to be in the pictures. I don’t like how I come out but… one day I’m gonna wonder how I looked like at 35, 36, 45, 84… right? Lol

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  13. Look at those two Biscuit/s – twining. Love the bubble wrap story. A hoot. So cool that you can track your fav flight attendant. I always ALWAYS take photos at our grad parties and I’m feeling a little bummed that I took a pic of Curly with her cake but hardly any other photos. I’m chalking it up to – fun party and I was enjoying it vs capturing it. I took a writing class once and the assignment was to write down dreams – so I did that as soon as I woke up. That was quite the experiment. I imagine dreams about a close family member who is no longer here must be so tough. xo

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    1. I agree with enjoying it versus capturing it. I enjoyed it thoroughly. Mike and I talked about that very thing before the party began because we were so tired from preparing for it. We made a point to just enjoy the evening. And Ella did too. 💜

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  14. Pingback: Something Good | Open Space Practice, (AKA: A Thousand Shades of Gray)

  15. I had some free time this morning, so I decided to catch up on YOU! Reading your posts is definitely one of ‘the little things’ that mean so much to me. I love reading everything you’ve kept.

    Graduations – I know exactly what you mean about breathing again when you realize it’s your last one. And the graduation goose made me so happy to see.

    Gelato – one of my favorite things in the world and so hard to find around here. I always seek it out when we’re traveling. I’d have chosen the raspberry.

    Anna’s flights! I love this so much and if you are allowed to share any of her stories, I’d love to hear about them. Where were her international and long haul flights?

    This month marks the one-year anniversary of my mother’s death. I recently was able to finally close her checking account and box up all her files, taxes, etc. to store in the basement for 7 years. And I’ve also had dreams about her. I’m right there with you, Kari.

    Off to see if there’s another post I’ve missed. XO

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    1. Aww, I love this so much! Thank you. 😘💜

      Once she’s done with summer school (7 days and counting!), then we can finally breathe a little before she starts college classes in the fall. It’s a little break, but so different from high school.

      I never really loved gelato until I tried this one. It was at an authentic Italian eatery, and it was so delicious. Raspberry sounds so good — I want to go back and try all the flavors.

      I’m a plane nerd (as you know), and I love getting the opportunity to talk about her flights any chance I get. Her international flights were London and Canada. She has SO many good stories. I’ll have to message you and tell you some of them.

      Oh friend, I can’t believe it’s been a year. I’ve been thinking about you. Maybe that’s why? I’m sending you so much love. Here’s to always having dreams of our parents — good dreams. 😘

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  16. Those unaware captures speak volumes! Look at how your girls are captivated by their mama. :)

    Congratulations on Ella’s graduation!

    I agree with menopause being a renewal—at least it has been for me.

    Kari, if I were wrapped in bubble wrap, I’d not be able to stop popping myself. I HAVE ZERO BUBBLE WRAP CONTROL!

    Dreaming about your dad. Sigh. I absolutely love having dreams about my parents, my brother, and my grandma. I always wake up in wonderment; how lucky I was to know them, and occasionally they revisit me!

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    1. I KNOW 😊

      Thank you, friend. Finally!

      It has for me too.

      I got an item wrapped in bubble wrap yesterday and I was a menace. I can’t be trusted around bubble wrap.

      I love that you still have dreams about them. This brings me so much hope and happiness. 💜

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  17. I’ve only just found your blog as a consequence of you liking a comment I made on “50 Happens” . I can’t believe you have been blogging since 2010, well done! I’m so going to enjoy reading your posts and catching up. As we say in England “ this is do up my street!”. Thank you for finding me and thus allowing me to find you 😊

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    2. I’m so glad you found your way here! 😊 That’s one of my favorite things about blogging—finding kindred spirits through the most unexpected paths. I hope you enjoy looking around, and I’m looking forward to getting to know you through your blog, too!

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  18. Kari, thank you so so much for the poem “If I carry my father”. Although it’s my mother who recently died, both my brother & I have felt the grief of his loss strongly and this expresses it beautifully. I will keep it close & share it with him too 💕

    While I’ve never considered wrapping myself up in bubble wrap, after my cancer diagnosis I was part of a photoshoot and wanted to wrap myself up in one of the quilts my daughter made as I felt they gave me a certain comfort and protection, so I totally understand this idea.

    That picture of Buddy is hilarious :D

    Ah yes, the “being there” aspect of parties. I hope it means you got to enjoy them fully because your phone was performing a different service during them.

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    1. Your comment touched my heart. It means so much to know the poem found you when it did. Even though it was written about a father, I think grief has a way of recognizing itself. I hope it brings a little comfort to both you and your brother. 😘

      I love that you wanted to wrap yourself in one of your daughter’s quilts. That makes perfect sense to me. There are some things that just feel like protection when the world feels uncertain.

      As for the parties, I think you’re right. It helped me stay present instead of wondering if I was missing something.

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