Blogging, Books, Soul Homework

The Books of My Life

Kari

What are the books of your life?

That’s the question I found myself facing after reading a recent blog post about the books of someone’s life. The someone happened to be a fellow blogger, which got me thinking about my own relationship with books.

I don’t always feel comfortable answering writing prompts like this because I haven’t always felt comfortable reading. I do enjoy reading now, but I’m pretty particular about what I read. I have very specific interests, and I get bored easily when I try to read outside of those interests.

I’ve learned that I’m much happier when I find the right book rather than simply trying to read more books.

I also loved The Very Hungry Caterpillar.

So I started thinking about the books that have actually mattered to me. And that led me to the first question.

What is your earliest reading memory?

I wish I could say I remember my mom and dad reading me book after book at bedtime, which they did, but I don’t. What I do remember is being rewarded. Especially with stickers and such.

That memory takes me back to one summer at my local library in Lexington, Ohio, where there was a summer reading program going on. I can vaguely remember choosing certain books to take home. I believe there was a paper posted on the wall where we could keep track of our progress, and I think we got to mark our progress in front of the librarian.

I got to put my books in a book bag. The books I picked had cool covers. I had no interest in what was happening on the insides of the books. I just knew I wanted to win the contest.

They made reading fun. They were getting me inside of a library and around books.

Was my motivation stickers and such?

Absolutely.

Do I remember what I read?

Absolutely not.

Now that I’m looking at this, Miss Suzy’s treehouse might have subconsciously influenced my own decor choices.

What was your favorite book growing up?

Miss Suzy by Miriam Young. It was about a squirrel who lived in a tree and found herself in a bit of a battle with some very bad squirrels.

When I was looking back at the books I might have read during that summer reading program at the library, I had a little realization: I think I may have stopped enjoying books around the age of seven or eight, when they stopped being picture books and became mostly text.

I never really thought about that before. I wonder if I associated reading with pictures, and when the pictures disappeared, so did some of the magic of reading for me.

That makes me a little sad to realize now.

courtesy Goodreads

What was the book that changed you as a teenager?  

There were actually four Judy Blume books that changed me in different ways, especially in how I saw myself as a girl and how I understood the world beyond the little corner of it I knew.

I grew up in a pretty rural part of central Ohio, so reading about girls who lived in New York City and suburban New Jersey in the late 1970s and early 1980s was eye-opening. Their lives felt completely different from mine.

Judy Blume was also writing about things that weren’t being talked about much anywhere else, at least not in my world. She wrote about getting your period, relationships, body image, and all the confusing things that come with being a girl and trying to figure out who you are.

The four books were:

Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret

Deenie

It’s Not the End of the World

Forever

After Judy Blume, though, my relationship with books got pretty quiet. From high school through college, I rarely read unless I had to for school. In my late 20s and 30s, I’d pick up an Oprah’s Book Club selection here and there, but reading still wasn’t really part of my life.

It wasn’t until I was around 50 that I started reading a lot more. And that’s when I began to realize that maybe I didn’t dislike reading as much as I thought I did. Maybe I just hadn’t found the right books.

Who was the writer who changed your mind?

Florence Scovel Shinn was the writer who opened the door to my soul homework in 2020. I first came across her name in another book, which led me to her work, and somehow that became the beginning of the whole soul homework journey.

Her ideas and affirmations changed the way I looked at my own life. They gave me a different perspective and made me question some of the ways I had always thought about myself and my life.

If I had never read Florence Scovel Shinn, I might never have started doing soul homework at all. And that makes her a pretty important writer in the story of my life.

What was the book that made you want to be a writer?

There really isn’t one.

I don’t necessarily connect reading and writing in my mind. I didn’t read a particular book and suddenly think, I want to do this too. Writing came from somewhere else for me.

There are, however, writers whose styles I really love. I’m drawn to writers who can take ordinary life, turn it over a little, and find something meaningful underneath it.

Writers and poets whose writing I’ve loved include Catherine Borrie, Mirabai Starr, James Crews, Francis Weller, Susan Moon, Claire Lombardo, Mark Nepo, Meg Kissinger, Terry Tempest Williams, Pema Chodron, Mary Oliver, Tara Brach, and John Green.

What is your comfort read? 

Bittersweet by LaVyrle Spencer. It’s one of those paperback romance novels from the 1990s, but it’s set in Door County, Wisconsin, which makes it special to me.

Door County has always held a special place in my heart, and there’s something about returning to this particular story that feels like returning to a familiar place. It has been a comfort read for me for decades.

What is the book you could never read again? 

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold.

What is the book you discovered later in life?

I have an unusual answer to this question.

I began collecting quotes when I was 50 and started adding them to a book I kept on my coffee table. I got the quotes from all sorts of places, but mostly from reading. I filled my first quote book last year, after six years of adding quotes to it.

I found a new larger book online last year and have been slowly adding to it ever since. It will take many years to fill this one, which makes me very happy.

I love going back and reading through my books of quotes every once in a while. There’s something really nice about having a place where I’ve collected the words that have meant something to me over the years. It’s almost like a little record of where my mind has been.

I highly recommend creating a book of quotes or thoughts of your own.

What is the book you’re currently reading?

I’m almost afraid to tell people about a book that I really love because I know someone might go on Goodreads and give it two stars. And for some reason, that hurts my feelings.

I know. Who cares?

I do.

When I love something, I care about it. And I want other people to see what I see in it, too.

I can’t remember how I found this book, but I’m so glad that I did. I really enjoy the way this author writes. It’s a comfortable read, and she’s easy to understand.

My Year of Living Spiritually by Anne Bokma

What is the book you haven’t found yet? 

For the past year, I’ve quietly been working on writing two books.

Even typing that makes me nervous.

I’ve done this before. I wrote a screenplay. I wrote an entire book about menopause and even sent it to publishers. Neither went anywhere.

I think that’s part of why I haven’t said much about what I’m working on now. There’s something safer about keeping it to myself. If nobody knows I’m trying, nobody knows if nothing comes of it.

But this feels different.

One is a collection of essays about ordinary life, the things I’ve spent years writing about here: family, growing older, noticing things, trying to understand myself, and finding meaning in places I probably would have missed when I was younger.

The other began when my dad was diagnosed with cancer. It started as a way to document what was happening and has slowly become something else, a book about my dad, grief, memory, and what remains after someone is gone.

I’ve been writing and rewriting both for the past year, mostly without telling anyone what I was doing.

It’s also why I sometimes go quiet here. I used to be much better at doing a bunch of things at once. I’m not anymore. When I’m deep into working on one of the books, I don’t have much left for the blog. So if I disappear for a little while, that’s probably where I am.

Maybe I’m telling you now because I need to make it real. And maybe I need a little accountability too. It’s harder to quietly put something away when I’ve told all of you that I’m working on it.

I have no idea what will happen with either book. That part is scary to admit too.

But I want to try.

So I guess the book I haven’t found yet might be one of my own.

Now tell me, what are the books of your life?

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79 thoughts on “The Books of My Life”

    1. Yay! I hope you love My Year of Living Spiritually! You’ll have to let me know what you think. 💜

      And I love that so many people are mentioning commonplace books in the comments. I didn’t even know that was what I was creating when I started mine! 😂

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  3. I really enjoyed this peek behind the curtain. I’m glad you’ve gotten back into reading, and that you’re finding the courage to share your heart and words with the world.

    Also, the Lovely Bones also messed me up. That was such a hard read as a teen, and I imagine infinitely more so as a mother.

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    1. Thank you, Erin. 💜 Finding the courage to actually tell everyone I’m writing them was a whole thing in itself.

      And YES. The Lovely Bones messed me up too. I could only watch the movie once, and honestly, I’m surprised I even watched it knowing what the book was about! I have never been able to bring myself to watch it again.

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  4. You’re the type of person who *should* write and share your writing, by which I mean, I love your honesty about your journey and your lack of pretention.

    I remember when all the girls in Jr High were reading Judy Blume books, and I felt jealous. It’s not that I wasn’t allowed to read them exactly, but someone, maybe in church, had warned me away. :(

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    1. Stephanie, thank you so much for saying that. Especially the part about my lack of pretention. I was so nervous about sharing that I’m working on these books because I didn’t want it to come across as LOOK AT ME, I’M WRITING BOOKS! So this means a lot to me.

      And it makes me sad that you felt like you shouldn’t read Judy Blume when all the other girls were reading her. Especially because so much of what made those books wonderful was that she wrote about the things girls were already thinking about but didn’t always feel like they were allowed to talk about. 💜

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      1. Oh, no, Look At Me is definitely not how you come across, Kari. There’s a lot of kind energy that comes through from your posts, which feel truly helpful and thoughtful. <3 Even this morning I began a quote book, inspired by your practice.

        Thank you for really feeling with me, too, re Judy Blume. The young girl I was needed those kinds of books and support. I hope young girls today have access to what they deserve.

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      2. Stephanie, thank you. ❤️ That means more to me than you know. And I LOVE that you started a quote book! I hope you love keeping one as much as I do. I’m always adding something new to mine!

        And yes. I wish that younger version of you had been given those books and that support, too. I hope girls today are given the freedom to find the books that help them feel seen, understood, and less alone.

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      3. Hm, I responded to your comment yesterday and now don’t see that at all! Thanks so much for solidarity with the girl that I was. Ultimately I’m sure that because those around me were reading, her influence reached me in ways I may not be able to recognize!

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      4. Sometimes my WordPress eats comments. Grr.

        That is such a good point. Sometimes the people who influence us do it so quietly that we don’t recognize it until much later, if ever. Just growing up around people who were reading probably shaped you in ways you couldn’t have known at the time.

        And I will always have solidarity with the girls we once were. 💜

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  5. These are some fun questions! I’m not sure I have memories of actual people reading to me when I’m young (though I know they did!) but I do have memories from a very young age of specific books.

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    1. Isn’t it funny what our brains decide to hold onto? I have such specific memories of certain books from when I was little, too. Sometimes I can remember the book itself better than I can remember where I was or who was reading it to me. 💜

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  6. Woo-hoo!!!

    I’m so excited you’re working on more books!

    °•\\^.^//•°

    No pressure. No expectations. Just support from me to you.

    You wrote you just want to try. I am a BIG supporter of TRYING.

    Goal oriented achievement driven action can suck it!

    You wrote – one book is about “what remains when someone is gone.” I would really love to read this. People can slowly disappear before they are entirely gone. And whether they’re gone in increments or entirety, I cannot wrap my head around what remains.

    It is both a enormous crashing wave and a quiet gentle ripple. They leave this Simultaneously. Which should be impossible but?

    Thank you for trying Kari. Even if you never feel comfortable sharing beyond yourself, thank you for trying.

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    1. Oh Maddie. This comment. 💜

      I knew you would understand the trying part. And I cannot tell you how much I love No pressure. No expectations. Just support from me to you. I think that is exactly what I needed to hear after finally telling everyone about these books. I’m scared of what happens next, and I’m scared of nothing happening next. But I am trying. Maybe that gets to be enough for right now.

      And then you somehow managed to describe so much of the book about my dad without ever having read it. People can slowly disappear before they are entirely gone. That is it. We lost pieces of my dad before we actually lost him, and then after he died, I started discovering all the things that remained.

      The enormous crashing wave and the quiet gentle ripple. I’m going to be thinking about that for a long time.

      Thank you for always seeing what’s underneath what I write. I love your comments so much. And I love you. 💜

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  7. Kari, this is such an intimate post; thank you for sharing all of this. I felt so much of it, both for myself and for you.

    I’m going to immediately begin my own Quote Book. I did that for one of my nieces when she left home for college, but how did I not think of doing it for myself? I also wrote out the quotes on colourful notecards and gave her a rack I made so that she could choose one per day (or whenever) and have it visible.

    So many of these points were ones I also discussed in a post or two over at my place, so I won’t repeat at length here.

    My parents didn’t read books to me that I recall. I learned to read from the newspaper as my dad read it. We were, however, at the local library every single week, and it was the place I loved best in the world. We also had lots of books at home because my older sister was an avid reader and often got books as gifts. I read them all, starting with The Bobbsey Twins, then to Nancy Drew, and Little Women as well as Little Men.

    Two books that had huge influence on me were To Kill A Mockingbird and A Tree Grows In Brooklyn. I was fortunate enough to teach TKAM for more than 30 years. I learned so very much from both.

    I wish you strength and success as you pursue writing your books. xo

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    1. Nance, I LOVE what you did for your niece with the quotes! And the fact that you even made her a rack so she could choose one to display makes it even better. What a thoughtful gift. I’m glad you’re going to start a quote book for yourself now too. 💜

      I also love that even though you don’t remember your parents reading to you, the library was your favorite place in the world. And how amazing that one of the books that had such an influence on you became a book you would go on to teach for more than 30 years. I love knowing that.

      Thank you so much for your encouragement about my books, too. It was scary to finally tell everyone about them, but I’m really glad I did. xo

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  8. I have such wonderful memories of going to the library as a child, too. That’s one thing I’m glad my mom was big on. I remember reading Are You There God? It’s me, Margaret when I was around 12. I left the book in the bathroom and my dad found it and freaked out. I was so embarrassed. Obviously, my dad was very strict (and overly-religious).

    I just ordered My Year of Living Spiritually on Abe Books. Thanks for the recommendation – it sounds so good.

    I am not familiar with Florence Scovel Shinn. I will look her up! Now I want to know more.

    I’ve kept a quote book for a few years now. I’m always adding to it. Some of the quotes are ones that you’ve written in your blog posts.

    I absolutely love that you are writing two books. I’m sure that was vulnerable for you to tell us about, so thank you. I’m sure everyone here will be of encouragement to you. That’s ok that you don’t know what will happen with either book. You are not meant to know right now. Just enjoy the process of writing. One step at a time.

    xoxo

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    1. I love that you ordered My Year of Living Spiritually! I really think you’ll enjoy it.

      As for Florence Scovel Shinn, I should probably give you a little disclaimer before you go looking her up. 😂 Some of what she says is pretty out there, and I definitely don’t adhere to most of it. But reading her was one of the first things that got me thinking outside of the box about spirituality and life, and that is what I’m grateful for.

      I always think of you when I add something to my quote book! I love knowing that you have one too. And now I’m very curious which things I’ve written have made it into yours. 💜

      And thank you for what you said about the books. Until this post, the only people who knew were Mike, Anna, and Ella, and I had only told them recently. It was my little secret. I feel much more exposed now that everyone knows. I think part of me is afraid these will end up like the other projects I shared here years ago. Sometimes I wonder where younger me got the nerve to do those things and then tell everyone about them!

      But I’m trying very hard to do exactly what you said. Just enjoy the process and take it one step at a time. Thank you for always being so supportive of me. xoxo

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  9. Wow! I’ve just read this post sitting in bed as I start a new day. It gave me a strange sense of calm and for that reason I’d like to thank you. You obviously, maybe without realising, have an ability to spread your spirituality. I truly admire people who can sink into a calmer state of being.

    My mind is always too busy. I’ve tried meditation and other mindfulness exercises but I never keep going. That’s not to say I’m not happy with my life because most of the time I am. Reading for me is total escapism and from the minute I walked into our old library back in my small village on top of a hill in the Cotswolds when I was a young child I’ve been addicted to books. You’ve inspired me to think about writing about where books have taken me in life and what I was reading at specific times when my life took various turns.

    Thank you 🙏

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    1. Oh, this is such a lovely comment. Thank you so much. Knowing that something I wrote gave you a sense of calm as you started your day means more to me than you probably realize. 💜

      And I really hope you write about where books have taken you throughout your life! I would love to read that. I especially love the image of you walking into that little library in your village in the Cotswolds as a child and beginning a lifelong love of books. What a beautiful place for that story to begin.

      Thank you for this. Truly. 💜

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  10. I don’t look at Goodreads reviews anymore because almost always a book I love will be eviscerated, or a book I didn’t love will have five stars. So I just keep my own spreadsheet and star rating, just for myself.

    Deenie was a hugely important book for me! I loved all of Judy Blume but Deenie was special.

    I have so many comfort reads! It really depends on my mood. One of my favourites is Diary of a Provincial Lady. I’ve read it so many times it has fallen apart, and the funny thing about that book is that I picked it up at a used book store. I had never heard of it. It was waiting for me, I guess!

    I have always loved reading, I can’t remember not reading. For me, reading and writing are linked together. Both are such an important part of my life, I cannot imagine not having them.

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    1. I’m so glad someone else mentioned Deenie! I loved so many Judy Blume books too, but there was something about that one that really stuck with me.

      And I LOVE that you found Diary of a Provincial Lady completely by accident in a used bookstore and now you’ve read it so many times it has fallen apart. That might be my favorite kind of book story. You didn’t go looking for it at all. It just found you. 💜

      Also, I think I need to take your advice and stop looking at Goodreads reviews.

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  11. Lovely post, Kari, thank you. I’m with you about taking it personally when people don’t like something like a favourite book or song. I learned to let that go a little when posting songs on my blog, realizing that we all have different tastes, but also remembering that criticism needn’t be mean.

    A book that I’d say changed my life was The Bridges at Toko-Ri by James A. Michener. It’s a tragic story about an American pilot in the Korean War. I suppose it was the first real exposure I had to studying about war and probably led me to have such respect and honouring for my late father’s service to his country.

    I haven’t been much of a reader most of my life (I always said it was because I read and wrote so much at work) but this year so far I’ve read ten books, which has to be a record for me.

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    1. I love hearing which book changed your life, Steve, and especially why. It’s amazing how one book can open a door to something that ends up becoming so meaningful to us. I can completely understand why The Bridges at Toko-Ri would have stayed with you and deepened the way you thought about your dad’s service.

      I also love that you’ve been reading more this year. As someone who wasn’t much of a reader for a huge portion of my life either, I appreciate that very much. Maybe we’re both making up for lost time. 💜

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  12. Oh, what a great way to think about books of your life! It’s interesting to think about how fundamental books are to your development as a human. <i>A Tree Grows in Brooklyn</i> was so important in who I have become. If reading books while everyone else was going out was good enough for Francie, it was good enough for me. I feel like my blog is the equivalent of a quote book. I write down lines of note for most books I read and love that I can go back there anytime I want. A commonplace book feels fundamental to serious readers.

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    1. I love that A Tree Grows in Brooklyn was that book for you. And I love your reasoning that if reading while everyone else was going out was good enough for Francie, it was good enough for you. 😂

      I had never thought about a blog being a kind of quote book, but you’re right! I love being able to go back and find things I wrote years ago that I otherwise would have completely forgotten. I also didn’t know the term commonplace book until fairly recently. Apparently I accidentally made one without knowing what I was doing. 😂

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  13. Kari, thank you for sharing that you’ve been writing two books. I think it’s wonderful! You are a gifted blog writer, and it makes me very happy to think of you sitting in your beautiful home, writing for hours, and knowing that’s the reason your blog posts have become less frequent. Why am I picturing you writing with a feather pen and a pot of scented ink? Probably not the case!

    I LOVE that your decor style may have been influenced by Miss Suzy’s Treehouse! It looks like a lovely, cozy place. I think my whole life has been influenced by picture books!

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    1. Thank you for being so supportive. I wasn’t sure if I would share this on here, but lately I’ve been falling a little behind, and I felt like I wanted to give an honest explanation. I absolutely love you picturing me with a feather pen and a pot of scented ink! This actually will be in my head now as I continue to work on my books and edit. 😂

      I think my entire life has been influenced by those picture books as well, Michelle. Thank goodness for them. 💜

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  14. There are so many things I’d like to say here. For one, I’m sorry that it took you so long in life to discover a love for reading, but I also know that everything happens at exactly the right time for all of us. And I’m happy you’re finding such meaningful books now.

    I am grateful that I was being read to when I was one and two years old, sitting on my mom’s lap when she read to my older brother. It allowed me to read by myself at a very young age and I’ve never stopped. From my very early days, I remember loving “The Pokey Little Puppy”. But then, I was given ” A Child’s First Book of Horses” plus one for birds and another for dogs. Then “The Big Book of Fairies and Elves.” I also loved John Steinbeck’s “The Red Pony”, but “Black Beauty” by Anna Sewell was probably the most impactful of my youthful books. I could go on forever, but I’ll stop. It is your blog, after all. 😘

    I’m interested in “My Year of Living Spiritually” – sounds wonderful. Keep writing and keep reading. They feed you. 💜

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    1. I love that you were basically learning to read while sitting on your mom’s lap listening to her read to your older brother. And The Pokey Little Puppy! I remember that one too.

      Also, you never have to stop talking about books because it’s my blog. 😂 I loved reading which ones stayed with you!

      I really hope you read My Year of Living Spiritually. You’re now one of several people in these comments who has mentioned being interested in it, which makes me so happy. I hope if you do read it, you’ll come back and tell me what you thought.

      And I love what you said at the end. Writing and reading really do feed me. It just took me a while to figure that out. 💜

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      1. Being started so very young made a huge difference in my life. My Mom used to take us to the town library when I was 5. She did good. 😊

        If you knew how many books I have and have read, you would never extend such an open invitation. LOL. I added “My Year of..” to my Goodreads list, but I added another one you recently mentioned to a different list. I’ll have to coordinate. 😜 I’m always up for Soul Homework.

        Right now, I’m reading A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini, but when I’m done, I might finally read A Handmaid’s Tale. I think it’s appropriate for our times. 💜😘

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      2. LOL, I may regret that open invitation, but I doubt it. 😂

        I love hearing what other people have read and which books have stayed with them.

        And I love that you’re always up for Soul Homework. 💜

        I’m curious which other book you added to your list! You definitely have plenty of reading lined up for a while.

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  15. You’re writing a couple of books? Fantastic! I’m proud of you! I hear from people often that I should write one. But the pages are blank. I’m not opposed to it. But I don’t have a really cool story to tell. Maybe it will come to me some day? I love the fact you figured out that it’s not that you don’t like to read, but that you haven’t found the right book. When I worked for Scholastic, parents sometimes told us their child doesn’t like to read. We always told them just that..find the right book.

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    1. Thank you, friend! I still feel a little nervous saying out loud that I’m writing two books, so the encouragement means a lot.

      And maybe your book hasn’t found you yet! I don’t know that we necessarily need a really cool story to tell, either. Sometimes it’s just something we can’t stop thinking about that eventually wants to be written.

      I love that you used to tell parents the same thing at Scholastic! It took me until I was 50 to figure that out for myself. Finding the right books changed everything for me. 💜

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  16. Well, you know I love this topic so much. It makes me so happy that you came to reading later in your life. I was more like Patti (I clicked through to her answers, thank you for linking) and reading was so much a part of my childhood I can’t imagine my life without it. (I mean, I became an English teacher and then a librarian.) And I love hearing about the books you are writing. I think it’s OK to keep creative projects private. Sometimes you need to for a good long while, until they are strong enough to withstand some light. I’ve also disappeared a little bit in recent months, and for the same reason. I’m working on a long essay, and I can’t let it sit too long or it goes cold and it takes me a while to warm it back up again. Like an instrument that hasn’t been played. I like thinking of us each working quietly in the background on something that matters to us.

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    1. I love this so much. Especially what you said about keeping a creative project private until it’s strong enough to withstand some light. I think that’s exactly what I needed to do with these books for a while.

      And YES to something going cold when you leave it too long. Although something interesting happened with mine. I walked away from one of the books for a few months, and that’s when I started writing the book about my dad. When I finally came up for air from that one, I found myself wanting to go back and look at the first book again. I think the time away actually helped me come back to it with fresh eyes.

      I love thinking of us both quietly working away on something that matters to us, too. And now I’m very curious about your long essay. 💜

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  17. I enjoyed this so much! Oddly, I don’t remember The Very Hungry Caterpillar was a child, only as a mother. My first book memory is of Peter Rabbit. I was heartbroken for that bunny who lost his brass button. Around 4th grade, I became obsessed with Nancy Drew. I always asked for one for my birthday/Xmas and still have those. I remember the county libraries we went to as a child, but mostly the bookmobile that came every other week on Wed in the summer to my neighborhood and parked right by my driveway. You could only take out 4 books at a time and it was such a hard choice.

    I absolutely loved every Judy Blume book as well as a book I owned called, ‘The Cat Ate My Gymsuit’ by Paula Danziger. It was so relatable because I hated gym class, too! I also remember a series about two best friends named Ginny and Jennifer that I loved.

    Another memory . . . sitting in my high school library reading Sidney Sheldon books! LOL! My reading dropped to zero by the time I was in college and then working, as well as having babies. I probably didn’t read one book for 15 years. Then a friend gave me ‘The Firm’ because both of our husbands had worked at the same law firm and holy cow, I was reading that book standing up to escape my toddlers!

    In 2000, a neighbor I didn’t know that well asked me to join her new book club and we met monthly for 10 years. I was introduced to classics I had never read such as ‘Pride & Prejudice,’ ‘The Good Earth,’ ‘In Cold Blood’ and ‘A Tree Grows in Brooklyn.’ When the book club split, I tried another one, but it just wasn’t the same. I decided I just wanted to read what I wanted to read. I read through all of Jane Austen’s books for the first time this year and also ‘Anne of Green Gables’ which I had only seen the PBS series before. I’m only reading for pleasure these days, with an occasional medicine or nutrition book thrown in.

    Thanks for letting me go on and on about one of my favorite topics!

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    1. You had a Bookmobile! That is so cool! And I remember Paula Danziger! I went to look up her books and discovered that she started the Amber Brown series in the 90s, which feels a little like the Junie B. Jones for millennials. I love that.

      And SIDNEY SHELDON. I haven’t heard that name in ages, probably since the 80s! I read The Firm too. Such a good book.

      I loved reading your comment so much. It’s fun hearing about the books that were part of someone else’s life, especially when they bring back memories of books and authors I’d almost forgotten about. Thank you for sharing yours here. 💜

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  18. P.S. I remember your book about menopause because of your podcast, which I miss! I’m so impressed that you are continuing on your writing journey with two more books! YEAH!

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    1. I miss making those podcasts. Spotify made some changes, and I kind of gave up.

      Thank you, friend! I didn’t actually plan on writing a book. I just sat down one day and decided to do it, as crazy as that sounds. The book about my dad is different. I’d had thoughts about that one in my head for the last year or so. I just wasn’t ready to write about it until recently.

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  19. Much like you, I wasn’t a big reader as a child. I had a few favorite books, and what do you know: They contained a multitude of pictures! I suppose I’ve always been a visual learner.

    I also read a few Oprah books as a younger woman, and I enjoyed them. I even recall, before that, getting books via the Book Club thing where you paid a penny for seventy-eight books. Or something like that. Mostly Danielle Steele or Stephen King books back then. But I would probably read six or seven books over a years time.

    It’s just in the last few years that I’ve made much more time for reading (both audio and physical). You’re right, though; you have to read something that keeps your interest.

    I love that you are working on a few writing projects. Bravo to you!! It makes me happy to know you’ve ignited that creative flame once again.

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    1. It sounds like we had such similar relationships with reading! I love that we both dipped into the Oprah books here and there and then really found our way to reading later in life. And yes, finding the right books makes ALL the difference.

      Thank you so much for the encouragement about my writing, too. It was scary to put that out there, but I’m really glad I did. 💜

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  20. I think it’s wonderful that you’re writing books. It is a hard thing to share – it feels like opening up the vulnerable bits of ourselves. It’s not unlike making recommendations/sharing book titles you like. I’m with you – I don’t do it often. I also take it personally if you don’t like my choices. It feels critical.

    I will not be rereading Elie Wiesel/s “Night” about his time in a concentration camp.

    I have some memories of my parents reading to us – I have two brothers. I don’t remember not reading. I was reading books in kindergarten. I started on the Nancy Drew books in grade one, and loved them. It set a kind of standard – she is a competent heroine, and I like that.

    My favourite Judy Blume was Blubber, appropriate for someone with an emerging eating disorder, but we all gathered around and read the steamy scenes from Forever.

    I read a lot of fantasy and science fiction stories. I think they were formative in terms of my character – ethical, moral, loyal, honest, left-leaning – though I should’ve perhaps read some more on tolerance and flexibility.

    I don’t like Goodreads. It’s an Amazon joint.

    I’m currently reading a the second book of the Filthy Rich Fae series by Geneva Lee. I found that one on Spicy Tok.

    The number one complaint I’ve receive in relationships is that I read too much lol

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    1. YES! You completely understand what I mean about recommending books. It feels weirdly personal when you love something and someone else doesn’t see what you see in it. I’m trying to get better about that. 😂

      I’m not a huge fan of Goodreads either.

      I loved Blubber too! I almost included it in this post, but I figured I couldn’t possibly list every Judy Blume book I loved. And yes to Forever. That was definitely the book everyone wanted to get their hands on.

      Also, I think reading too much might be one of the better complaints someone can receive in a relationship. There are definitely worse habits to have! 💜

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  21. I love this post! And I really, really love that you are writing two books yourself. Even if they go nowhere, you’re doing it for you…and that’s all that matters. I wish you the best of luck and hope to one day read your published words. :)

    My favorite book growing up was “Rascal” by Sterling North. It’s the true story of a boy growing up in southern Wisconsin (amazingly enough, just a stone’s throw from where I live now…the next town over even has a museum dedicated to him) and his pet raccoon. I re-read it when we moved here four years ago, and it was every bit as good as I remembered, even as an adult.

    My comfort book? The “Lord of the Rings” trilogy. I never fail to get completely swept up in Tolkien’s Middle Earth, no matter how many times I read it.

    The book that made me want to be a writer? “The Sea Wolf” by Jack London. He was my favorite author growing up, and that particular story really struck a chord with me. It made me want to write my own adventure tale about good vs. evil and nature vs. man. Sure enough, I did!

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    1. Thank you, Mark! I really appreciate that. I’m trying very hard to hold onto the idea that even if these books never go anywhere, writing them matters because I’m doing something that means so much to me. Of course, I also really hope you get to read my published words someday. 😊

      I love that you went back and read Rascal after moving so close to where the story took place, and that it still held up for you as an adult. There’s something really special about discovering that a childhood favorite still works all those years later.

      And I love the full-circle story of The Sea-Wolf. A book made you want to write your own adventure story about those themes, and then you actually DID IT. That might be my favorite answer to that question. You didn’t just want to become a writer. You became one.

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  22. Me again! 😊. I added 13 books to my TBR shelf between the big county annual library sale and a subsequent Thrift Books order, and now 2 from you, plus 2 from another blogger – The Midnight Train by Matthew Haig and I See You Called in Dead by John Kenney. Mind you, I have another curated list of about 35 books that I will look at when I make a dent in these! If interested, I can email you that list. Even so, I jump sideways at any given moment.

    I see, above, people not liking Goodreads because it is owned by Amazon. I had not even realized that!

    Can you/they suggest some other such service? I’d have no problem moving over. Hmmm … I have a Thrift Books account – anyone have experience with them for TBRs?

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    1. First of all, YES, please email me that list! I would love to see it. And I completely understand jumping sideways at any given moment. I can have a perfectly good stack of books waiting for me and then hear about one new book and suddenly that is the book I need to read next.

      I knew Goodreads was owned by Amazon, but I’ve used it for so long that I’ve never seriously looked for an alternative. I’d actually be curious to hear what others recommend too. I’ve heard of StoryGraph, but I haven’t used it myself. And now I’m curious about using ThriftBooks for TBRs too!

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      1. HI! I will email a list (or two) to you over the weekend. I have several. 😜

        Also, on my own IG, here are the books I got from the sale – https://www.instagram.com/p/DXpNc0nEZlO/?img_index=1 and here are the ones I got afterward from Thrift Books because I had also been looking for these – https://www.instagram.com/p/DY7m6HUkWSA/ There are reviews on several of them if you scroll towards the latest posts.

        Just a note – The Golem and the Jinny is one of my favorite top 8 books of all time, so I ordered it in hardcover for my perm. bookshelf, and also The Golden Palace, also in hardcover, as that is Helene Wecker’s sequel that took 7 more years to write. Beautiful stories, historical fiction at the turn of the century, most of The Golem and the Jinny taking place on the Lower East Side in NYC. (IDK about the sequel yet)

        For now, I think I’ll stick with Goodreads, too – it’s just easier. Take care, back soon! Mwah! 💜

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      2. I can’t wait to dive into your lists! Thank you for all of these lovely things to look into.

        I feel the same way about Goodreads. Just easier. 🤣💜

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  23. Okay, your last answer fills my heart with such happiness and hope and I am going to stop because there is no pressure. xxoo

    This was a delight to read. Books are such a big, wonderful, important part of my life, and I love reading about their place in others’ lives.

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    1. That makes me so happy. And yes, no pressure! That might be exactly what I need right now. 💜

      I loved answering these questions for the same reason. I could read about other people’s relationships with books all day. I think the books we love, the ones we remember, and even the ones we couldn’t finish tell us so much about each other. Thank you for reading and sharing in my excitement. xxoo

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  24. These are great questions about books. I went to The Guardian to see who had answered them and was not familiar with very many of the famous people. Not sure what that says about me!

    I like that you have a book of quotes that you can refer back to. And that you have written/are writing several different types of works. I think it’s okay for the writing to be for ourselves. That’s why I write my blog.

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    1. Ha! I wasn’t familiar with a lot of the people who answered them either, so you’re in good company. I just loved the questions and immediately wanted to answer them myself.

      My quote book has become one of my favorite things. I started it a few years ago, and I love going back through it and seeing what words meant enough to me at the time that I wanted to save them.

      And I completely agree about writing for ourselves. I think that’s one of the best things about blogging, too. Even if nobody else ever read what we wrote, there’s something valuable about having a place to put our thoughts and pieces of our lives. 💜

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  25. These are such great questions. I did not grow up as a reader – which I think is nuts, because my mom was a teacher. She urged us to do the summer reading program each summer, but aside from that – she didn’t encourage me to read. She wasn’t a reader herself. I rarely saw her read a book. I think had my mom modeled reading, I might’ve jumped on that gravy train.

    I remember my dad reading us The Litltle Engine That Could and I remember my mom trying to teach me to read with an early reader series that were called the I See Sam books. I remember looking at Richard Scary books with y brothers for hours. I loved all of those pictures.

    I really only strated to enjoy reading when the kids were older and I joined a book club. There are so many books that I’ve loved. I loved The Kite Runner. I loved Hamnet. I’m reading The Marriage Portrait right now.

    I’m so excited for you that you’re writing. Two books. Fabulous. Thank you for sharing that news here. I know the feeling, how hard it is to admit that you’re doing something that you enjoy, while uncertain whether or not it’ll take shape the way you hope that it does. I think sometimes that writing for ourselves is a gift we give ourselves. I also know all about being divided between projects and feeling spread thing and wanting to work on the One Thing at a time. Good luck with it.

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    1. It’s so interesting that your mom was a teacher but wasn’t much of a reader herself. I think you’re right that seeing the adults around us reading probably makes such a difference. And Richard Scarry! I could look at those books forever too. There was so much going on in every picture.

      I love that you came to reading later, too. Sometimes I wish I’d had all those extra years of being a reader, but I also wonder if discovering books when I did made me appreciate them differently. And The Kite Runner is one I still need to read!

      Thank you so much for what you said about my writing. I think writing for ourselves really is a gift we give ourselves. Sharing that I’m working on these books felt strangely vulnerable, especially without knowing what will ultimately happen with them. But I’m so glad I said it out loud. And yes to wanting to work on One Thing at a time! My brain definitely prefers that, even when life doesn’t cooperate. 💜

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      1. I am in a writing group and a new guy showed up and he was arrogant and even if he was knowledgable, he didn’t really understand my project. He ‘taught’ me what a memoir is, etc. The other members in the group voiced that they understand my getting it all out there in one draft is part of my process, and that helped – but dang. It is hard not to second guess what the heck we’re doing at times like that.

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      2. Oh Ernie, I’m sorry. It’s hard enough not to second guess ourselves as writers without someone coming in and making us question our process too. I’m glad the other members of your group understood what you’re doing and spoke up. Keep trusting yourself and your process.😘

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  26. This is wonderful news about you writing! Now that I’m off the road, I often wonder why I’m spending any time at all blogging when I could be working on something bigger, better, more meaningful to me. I’m so glad you have that!

    You and I are opposites book wise. I grew up loving books, no other reward than devouring them. And, the best books I’ve read have made me want to give up writing entirely. In fact, I never wrote a word until years yours ago when I hit the road and started my blog to let people know where I was. So, the best books made me not even think abut writing. Why bother – there’s so much good stuff out there already!

    The book that changed me the most was Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace. I happened to spend a weekend with hm while he was writing it; he didn’t mention that at the time, but he got up in the middle of a movie and, it turns out, wrote a pivotal scene in the book. I was taking a graduate seminar on Hamlet at the time, which you can tell from DFW’s title is a big part of his themes. My mom and sister adored the book as well, so much that my mom wanted to have it shrunk so she would wear it like an amulet. She was so funny – that book is about addiction and suicide but is still beautiful. DFW killed himself after writing it, after it was named one of the best books of the century and he was given a MacArthur Genius Fellowship. Such an enormous loss. Such an amazing book. Why would I bother?

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    1. Wait. You spent a weekend with David Foster Wallace while he was writing Infinite Jest?? Shelly! I knew of him through things I’ve read over the years, but I’ve never actually read any of his books. Now I absolutely want to. I feel like there is an entire story here that I need to hear!

      And I love the image of your mom wanting to shrink the book down so she could wear it like an amulet. What a way to describe how much a book can mean to someone.

      I completely understand that feeling of reading something so good that you think, why would I even bother? I’ve had that thought too. But maybe the answer is simply that nobody else can write exactly what we would write. There’s room for all of it.

      And I hope you keep writing, even if blogging looks different now that you’re off the road. Maybe wondering whether there’s something bigger or more meaningful you want to work on is worth listening to. I’m certainly glad you bothered. 💜

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      5. Thank you, Shelly. That means a lot to me. I loved that our little conversation here turned into something more for you. That’s one of my favorite things about this blogging community. 💜

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      6. Man, it does NOT work to reply to an emailed comment with your comment, even though the email says to do that. What I meant to say was, Thank you for your graciousness for when I repeatedly reply to your posts with info about myself instead of you. I guess I am a self-centered commenter, most of the time. I appreciate your patience throughout.

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  27. Pingback: Where Books Have Taken Me: A Lifetime of Reading, Memories and Escape – A Midlife Adventure

  28. OMG. Judy Blume. Transformational books for our generation of women. You remind me I need to go watch the movie of “Are You there God it’s me Margaret.” It’s been on my list forever. I want to be reminded of the story.

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  29. I’d not heard of Judy Blume until recently. I’m not surprised not to have heard of her growing up as I did in the tropics, but I suspect she might not be as well known in the UK as in the US.

    When I was re-singled at age 50, I started to collect quotes and complimentary things which people said to me. Then I spoiled it by treating it as a journal, and I wrote a lot of dark feelings in there too. Once I got past that troubled time, I decided to destroy the book, as I didn’t want my daughter to have to read those thoughts. With hindsight, that feels rash and I wish I’d copied out the good stuff to keep.

    Thanks for the inspiration, I’ve decided to do one of these and have started putting it together already.

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    1. I can understand why you destroyed that book at the time, especially if you were worried about your daughter someday reading those darker thoughts. But I also understand wishing you still had some of the good things you collected there. I’m so glad this inspired you to start another one! Maybe this new one can hold all of those lovely things that are worth keeping. 💜

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