A few days ago, I had to ask Mike what phrase we used to describe staying in our houses during the epidemic. The word I was looking for?
Mike was planning his business travel last week when he planned a trip on a date that sounded familiar to me. He booked it through the travel agency his employer uses and was getting ready in the shower when he remembered why the date sounded familiar.
It is the day of our oldest daughter’s college graduation.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH US??
To celebrate my birthday week and the fact that I’m losing my/our mind(s), I thought it would be fun to write about the random information that’s been piling up in my phone.
I’ve kept a running list of things I’ve thought about that may be used as tater tot subjects, podcast blurbs, or just ideas to bring up in discussion with other people. But I have to jot them down in my notes because otherwise I would forget (see above).
And you should write yours down as well, for this will be your fate soon enough.
MUAH AH AH AH.
1-Soft grapes are not my favorite; I only like firm grapes.
2- I’m baffled as to why so many people love hummus.
3- Do you ever think about Hands Across America? Because I do.
4- Why is there such a large disparity between Amazon and Goodreads book ratings?
5- Why don’t cereal manufacturers include Ziploc-style enclosures on the inner bags? That’s because they want you to buy more. Capitalism sucks. Thank you for attending my TedTalk.
6-I’m so old that when I was in high school, there was only a boys soccer team. There was no girls soccer team. A female tried out for the team, and they “allowed” her to be on the team. I hate that I felt it was decent of coaches to “allow her” participate on the team.
7-In 2005, while cat sitting for a friend and her family while they were away at Disney World, I came dangerously close to killing said cat. Having said that, it should be noted that they lived in a massive spooky old home* with corridors, creaking ancient doors, and hidden chambers. For several days, I couldn’t locate the cat. (she told me that this was normal because her cat likes to hide from strangers)
Spoiler alert- the cat had been trapped in one of the secret rooms for four days without food or water after I had accidentally closed one of the hidden room doors.
When I finally discovered the cat, I began a 24-hour-a-day round-the-clock care of my own, attempting to hand-feed her baby food (vet recommended) while on the phone with their vet every other day. This was before to the advent of Google, social media, and cellphones. Thankfully, the cat survived and lived a long and happy life. The end.
*Because they no longer live here and are no longer married, I can refer to the house in this manner
** Dear God, I pray the cat incident was not the tipping point for the above.
*** I’m sure it wasn’t.
8-Who remembers Mr. Green Jeans?
9- When we go to public locations that aren’t crowded, they invariably get crowded once we arrive. Ella believes it’s because we’re secretly famous. We just don’t realize it.
10- I grew up in the town where The Shawshank Redemption was filmed.
What are some random things you want to remember?