i never expected that the day i opened my computer that june, my little blog would turn into a years-long journey. what started as sharing organizing tips and baking cookies—because, honestly, the world probably didn’t need another voice telling people how to organize a closet—slowly became something much more personal.
over time, the blog shifted — more than once. early on, i found myself writing about parenthood and marriage, and along the way, i was lucky enough to land paid assignments with netflix, chicago parent, and dyson.
i even tried my hand at writing a screenplay, then a book. neither got published, but i loved the process—especially the screenwriting part.
here are a few favorite posts that still hold a place in my heart:
understood – the inspiration behind my menopause book
hummingbird – my version of an obituary for my grandmother
sacred space – falling in love with our home
in the early days, my voice was a little sharper, a bit more focused on myself. over time, it softened—not so much in what i wanted to say, but in how i said it. i still love what i love, but i’ve learned i don’t need everyone else to love it too.
many of you, especially longtime readers, have noticed changes—not just in my tone, but in the way i write. i’ve grown, and naturally, so has how i show up on the page. just last week, while doing some soul homework, i found myself reflecting on what brought me here as a writer.
for me, lockdown was a turning point—a time to look inward, to slow down and sit with myself. writing a book cracked something open inside. i was embarrassed by my first draft, and when i faced rejection in my first round of queries, it shook my confidence and made me rethink everything i thought i knew about my voice.
but i kept going.
over several months, my dear friend kristen—a former high school english teacher turned middle school special ed teacher—patiently helped me learn how to write in a way that felt truer to who i am.
i doubt i would have been ready for that kind of growth without the soul work i’d done beforehand. it’s never easy to realize you’re not quite the writer you imagined, but it can be freeing, too — because that’s when the real work begins.
somewhere along the way, the old feelings of doubt and shame crept in. i’ve read so much about ego and doing things for the right reasons. and when i notice that part of me wants to be seen or validated, it’s easy to feel like a fraud.
is this blog — this public processing — just a way of saying, “look at me”? couldn’t i have just kept a private journal? wouldn’t that feel more sincere?
but here’s what i’m beginning to realize: wanting to be seen isn’t the same as showing off. wanting to connect, to speak the truth out loud, to say “this hurt” or “this matters” — that’s not ego. that’s being human.
maybe ego nudges me to hit “publish.” but soul is what’s really sitting at the keyboard.
and maybe writing publicly is part of the soul’s work, too. it’s one thing to reflect privately. it’s another to risk being seen, to leave the door cracked open and trust that someone kind might read their way in — someone who might need to hear it.
after everything life has thrown my way, it’s safe to say i’m not the same person who started this blog all those years ago.
some fun things that happened along the way:
stood on stage in front of 500 people and shared funny stories about motherhood.
i took a trip to new york city with a friend
rebecca and i went to chipotle and got on television
i used to wonder what the point of this blog was — especially when i got caught up chasing numbers, comparing myself, hoping something bigger might come from all this writing. but now, fifteen years in, i see it differently. this blog has never needed to be anything more than a place to return to myself. a place to remember, to reflect, to make sense of things.
there are still parts of my life i don’t share here — not because they aren’t important, but because they involve people i love. my kids, my husband, my family — they didn’t sign up to be written about. when i do share stories about them, it’s always with their permission. like my dad’s cancer or mike’s broken leg — those moments are shared between us, but ultimately belong to them. their stories have shaped me, but they belong to them.
the things i’ve had to recover from — quietly, privately — have changed me. they’ve shaped me not just as a person, but as a writer. and though they live off the page, they’re woven into everything i write. this blog is about me, and i’ve learned that honoring someone else’s privacy can be its own kind of storytelling — quiet, careful, and just as true.
i don’t talk about this blog much in my everyday life, and i’m not sure why. maybe it’s always felt a little tender — a part of me that lives quietly in the background. but when someone i love brings it up, it means more than they probably know. i’m trying to let it be less of a secret in this next chapter.
thank you to every single one of you who’s read, commented, shared, or just quietly visited over the years. your encouragement, kindness, and presence here have been the heart of this blog.
truly.
i don’t know what’s next. but i’ll keep writing, in whatever way makes sense, for as long as it feels right.
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I know I said it before … I am so grateful for you and your presence here.
“Wanting to be seen is not the same as showing off.” That is profound and t-shirt worthy. I too believe that we all want to be seen, in a deep way. Thank you my friend for your honesty, transparency, and being good with words. Multiple hearts (still can’t find the dang emoji’s on wp on my laptop. lol!)
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Aww, thank you so much, friend. Your words always lift me up more than you know.
This is the third time I’ve been quoted to myself in the comments—and it feels really, really nice. 💜
Thank you for always reading, for leaving such thoughtful and loving comments, and for truly making me feel seen. I appreciate you so much, Donna. I hope you know that.
ALL THE EMOJIS. 😘💜🌈🦋🌺
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You’re welcome. Thank you for your kind words and I do feel it.💗😘
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I’m so glad. 😘💜
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It’s wonderful reading about other people’s blogging journeys. I think all our blogs have, over the years, morphed to reflect us and our daily lives, and events going on around us. How could it not.
Oh, and I love that you tried your hand at writing. Bravo. That’s quite the achievement.
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It really is, isn’t it? I agree—our blogs morph as our lives do.
Thank you, Alexandra! 😘💜
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Happy blogiversary! This Friday makes 13 years that I’ve been blogging and I too went through lots and lots of changes and different voices and had a slightly different focus at different times within that span. I love the one I’m writing now the most though. It feels the most authentic and I think my readers can tell that too as I feel like I’ve made the most amazing friends.
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Thank you, friend! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU TOO!!
Your voice is definitely authentic, and you’re so right—the more authentic you are, the better friends you make because you’re simply being YOU. 💜
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I loved reading this. Congratulations on being consistent in sharing over the last fifteen years, a feat most people could not do. Of course your blog and blog writing have evolved, because YOU have evolved, you’ve grown, just as we are supposed to.
I just read the Hummingbird post. *tears* I love that story. Your Grandma looks so much like your Mom, and you. XO
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Aww, thank you, friend! I love that you’re still blogging too. It means so much that we’re all on this blogging journey together—that’s a huge part of why I keep doing it every week.
And yes, we definitely all have that Sprague chin and nose. Genetics are pretty amazing! 💜
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Kari,
There is so much wisdom in this. There are many parts I’d like to pull out, but I particularly appreciate this: “it’s one thing to reflect privately. it’s another to risk being seen, to leave the door cracked open and trust that someone kind might read their way in — someone who might need to hear it.”
I remember when you were more of a humor writer, and I remember when your writing began to take a more serious turn. At first, I missed light and funny Kari. Then, you wrote something about needing to let go of people who won’t let you change into the person you’re becoming, and I realized there was something deeper happening for you than a change in writing focus. I stuck around because I wanted to see what you were becoming. So glad I did. Can’t wait to see what the next 15 years brings for you.
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Oh friend, thank you for this comment. This is the second time I’m reading my own words back, and it feels so good. Don’t let me get a big ego here in the comments—or I’ll have to bring back the funny! 💜🤣
When I started doing soul homework while writing the book, I began doubting myself and the way I wrote on the blog, and honestly, I didn’t like that space at all. Then I realized a lot of my humor was self-deprecating because I didn’t like myself. That was the shift. I began to love myself—cheesy as that sounds.
I’ll tell you this: if you meet me in person, I’m still light and funny Kari. (So we definitely need to meet)
Thank you for sticking with me through all the twists and turns of my writing journey. I’m so grateful for you and your friendship. 😘💜
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You’re still light and funny Kari here, too. You’re right, though: It’s not self-deprecating humor now. It’s a more kind humor. And it’s laced through the hard, important things. It’s really something, you know?
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That really means a lot—thank you. I think I’m still learning how to let humor be a companion to the hard stuff instead of a shield from it. I’m so grateful you see it. 💜
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Happy 15 years of entertaining the masses :)
First, I loved, loved, loved the post about your grandmother. 102 years old! WOW! I was fortunate to know 3 of my grandparents, but they all passed in the 70’s-80’s (two were born in the 1890’s, so there’s that!) I still miss them and always say I’ll write posts about them, but I only ever did one. Just the thought exhausts me emotionally.
Secondly, I can’t believe you met Bethenny Frankel! AND that you had a gig for a crowd of 500! That is beyond amazing! I can’t think of anything noteworthy that’s happened since I started my blog in 2008, though I must say that meeting people from around the world has been the highlight for me. I don’t really write about personal things either, so I understand. It’s only been recently that I’ve posted any family photos. I still remember the feeling of hitting ‘Publish’ for the first time, all those years ago. How scary was that??
Thanks so much for continuing the journey with us. I’m so grateful to have found you and there’s not a day goes by that I don’t think of you. XO
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HAHAHA! That’s funny—thank you, friend! 💜
We were lucky to have her for so long. I think that’s why we were in shock when my dad died when he did. We’re used to having so much longevity in our family. Writing about family members is a lot, honestly. I want to write a similar kind of post for my dad someday—I don’t know when, but just thinking about it is emotionally exhausting, even though I wrote about him a lot last year. I was pretty numb then, I realize now.
Those were two very big, exciting things happening at the same time. I’d say that was my peak blogging period. I’m so grateful for those experiences—they were so much fun—but where I am now feels a lot more satisfying.
It’s always scary hitting publish! But back then, I didn’t think many people would read. I still get the jitters every time I hit publish—to this day!
I’m so grateful for you, my friend. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you either. 😘💜
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I have so much to say, where to begin?
First of all, everyone’s first draft is a disastrous mess. That’s what a first draft is for! Every single writer in the world, their first draft is a mess. That’s why it’s called the Shitty First Draft! Cleaning up is for subsequent drafts. Also, the query process is absolutely terrible, and I don’t think anyone can really be prepared for it even when we are prepared for it, you know? Like, Stephen King’s first novel was rejected 31 times, JK Rowling like 80. It’s insane. It’s a really flawed system and I don’t want to participate in it. But I do want my book published, so I’m exploring some options…
A screenplay! I had no idea!
My grandma loved hummingbirds, and every time I see one I think of her.
I love having a blog. I think it’s okay to be visible, and to want to be seen, and want to have others who read our blogs feel seen as well! There is such an important community aspect to the blog world, and I love it.
I don’t write much about my family either, just tiny anonymous snippets. I used to write more about motherhood, and maybe some kid anecdotes, but those are pretty few and far between now.
I am also not the same person who started a blog 17 years ago – but gosh, who is? 17 years is not nothing. We should all be changing and growing with the years, that’s what life’s journeys are.
I think everyone who knows me IRL knows about my blog! I’m pretty open about it, and I like having people read it. It also really helps me because I know that anything I write can be read. I don’t ever write anything I’d be ashamed to have someone talk to me to my face about.
Happy bloggy birthday! 15 is a big one!!
PS MY ZINNIAS ARE BLOOMING
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I love when a comment starts like this…
It makes me feel so much better knowing Stephen King’s first draft was rejected 31 times. Thank you for sharing that! 💜
I actually scrubbed my blog of the screenplay because it was that bad. I’m thinking of having AI rewrite it for fun since I really like the idea—I just had trouble with the original conception.
I love that we both think of our grandmothers when we see hummingbirds.
I feel the same way about having a blog. It’s so good for us to have this community because people outside of it don’t always understand—and that’s okay.
I used to write a lot about my family and being a mom in the beginning since I was right in the thick of it.
YES to life journeys and changing. Isn’t that what life is really about? 💜
I love how open you are about your blog with everyone. I don’t know why I’m not, but I want to work on that.
Thank you, friend!
YAY!! I can’t wait to see them!
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“over time, the blog shifted.”
Kari, isn’t that one of the greatest things about having a blog? Our blogs seem to change AS our lives change. It was the same with my blog. It started out with one intention, and then morph into different intentions as my life moved forward. I’ve even changed the name and theme of my blog over the years. A blog takes on a life of its own the longer we do it.
I think of a blog very much like performing live onstage – I never know what’s going to happen, what I’m going to say, or how my readers will receive what I say. A blog is very much a “singular” thing yet, it also involves other people because it’s a form of shared communication. I also find blogging therapeutic.
Blogging has remained my favorite medium of online media. Blogging is about “quality” not “quantity”. And I find blogging therapeutic.
And speaking of “lockdown”, I’m so grateful for my blog because it was a way for me to socialize and communicate with others, without being in person. As you shared, our natural human instinct is to “connect” with others. Blogging does that.
Not only do I love this post, but I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that photo of the paper versions of yourselves. It’s FAB-U-LOUS!!!!!
Happy 15th Year of Blogging Anniversary, my friend. So glad we met!
X
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Thank you so much for this beautiful reflection, Ron. You’re absolutely right—one of the greatest gifts of blogging is how it evolves alongside us, shifting as our lives do. I love how you described it as a live performance, full of surprise and connection.
Blogging has been such a therapeutic space for me too—a way to express, connect, and grow, especially during times like lockdown when real-life connection was limited.
I’m incredibly grateful we met through this journey. Here’s to many more years of shared stories and friendship. 💜
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Your blogging journey sounds exactly like what it needed to be for you to thrive. We all approach this medium differently; I know I’m not writing what I thought I’d be doing when I started. Not even close. Yet, like you mentioned, it feels right so I carry on… until I don’t. Happy 15th Blogging Anniversary. 🎉
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Thank you so much! I love how you put that — our blogging journeys really do evolve in ways we never expect, but somehow feel just right. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone in that. Here’s to carrying on — and knowing when it’s time to pause or change course. 💜
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Happy, happy 15th! This is a great post. What an adventure – I love it. I enjoy reading about your blog journey. It is so interesting how you/me/any blogger maybe starts out thinking about heading in one direction, but then as life shifts and things change, we roll with it. I’m trying to remember when I ‘found’ you. I think probably 8 or more? years ago. Hard to believe. Thank you for sharing YOU. I’m so glad that I’ve been here to see it all happen. xo
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Thank you, friend!
It’s so much fun to hear how people got started blogging. I might have to ask others to share their stories in a future post.
I’ve been trying to remember how we found each other too! I looked—it was in 2020, only five years ago! I think it was shortly after I shared that tater tot post, and I remembered exactly which one.
I’m so glad you’ve been here too, my friend. 😘💜
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Woo! Hoo! Congratulations on 15 years of blogging, dear Kari! I loved clicking the links to see some of the super cool things you’ve done over the years. I always feel better after reading your blog, because you say things like this:
“maybe writing publicly is part of the soul’s work, too. it’s one thing to reflect privately. it’s another to risk being seen, to leave the door cracked open and trust that someone kind might read their way in — someone who might need to hear it.”
and this: “wanting to be seen isn’t the same as showing off. wanting to connect, to speak the truth out loud, to say “this hurt” or “this matters” — that’s not ego. that’s being human.”
You are a wonderful writer and I hope you keep going for as long as your fingers can type!
Happy 15th Bloggiversary!
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Yay! Any excuse to eat cake is a celebration! 🎂
Aww, Michelle — I don’t think I’ve ever been quoted back to me before, and this feels so special. I love it so much. Your comments truly mean the world to me.
I love writing so much. I honestly can’t imagine a time when I won’t want to do it. It’s therapeutic for me right now, so I’ll keep going.
And I feel the same way about you and your blog, Michelle. It brings me so much joy. I hope you know I talk about you to my friends and family — especially my mom. She grew up on a farm raising Black Angus cattle, so she really enjoys it when I share your posts with her. 💜
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I’m so honored that you’ve talked about my blog to your friends and family! That really warms my heart. ♥️
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Happy 15th! I’ve learned so much about you in this post..a book and a screenplay? A book would be my ultimate goal but I don’t have an idea or concept yet. I love that you gave yourself permission to let your blog writing take you in the direction it needed to be. It’s beautiful, my friend.
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Thank you so much, my friend. I didn’t always know what I was doing, but looking back—it was a lot of fun. I’m so glad I did it!
I hope you get to do it too, no matter what the outcome. 😘💜
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All the cool kids have been blogging for 15 years! And I don’t say that because my blog turned 15 last December.
(OK, that’s totally why I said it. But it’s true!)
I think all blogs shift focus over the years, reflecting our personal growth. I started out writing about writing. And then I lost my job…took an amazing road trip…met Tara…moved…and moved again. I never could have foreseen any of these events when I first started, but they helped shape who I am today. I’m thankful I was able to write about them.
Congratulations and happy blogging anniversary again!
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We really have!
It’s true—here’s to 15 more years, my friend!
I love hearing other people’s blogging stories and all the twists and turns along the way. Yours is such a cool one, Mark. I think it’s pretty magical that you and Tara met through blogging—what a gift.
Thank you, friend! 💜
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I read your Sacred Space post. Comments are closed, so I’ll add mine here:
I totally get this. Tara and I have cut back on our travel quite a bit in the past couple of years, because – like you – we feel like our home is a paradise. Yes, we still want to get out and experience new things, but we are also perfectly content to just enjoy our own sacred space. Plus, I think fewer overnight getaways/vacations just means we enjoy them more when they actually happen.
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I forgot I set comments to close after 30 days—thank you for taking the time to leave one here instead!
There’s something so comforting about home feeling like a little getaway, isn’t there? I’m so glad you and Tara have a sacred space too. 😘💜
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Exactly! Until our Sheboygan getaway in April, we hadn’t gone on an overnight trip in like a year and a half…a record for us.
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Wow! That’s pretty cool.
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I also read the Chipotle post. While I’m personally a Qdoba guy, I will say, what an amazing experience! Did you ever catch the final episode? Did they edit out your embarrassing quote?
Also fun to see you use capital letters. Your writing was much different then! Almost reminds me of how I write today, lol.
Thank you for linking to these.
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I never went back and watched!
Back then, I loved an exclamation point, capital letters, and the word “awesomesauce.”
Maybe it’s time for a comeback?
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I think anyone who loved “Parks & Recreation” (myself included) used “awesomesauce” to death. I still do sometimes!
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I love it!
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I am a recent reader but am grateful to have found your blog.
“wanting to be seen isn’t the same as showing off. wanting to connect, to speak the truth out loud, to say “this hurt” or “this matters” — that’s not ego. that’s being human.” I think this is true for me, too. I write because I want to, whether it’s pretty or ugly, or whatever. It helps me process things, life, the world. Of course, the blogging community is so special.
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I’m so glad you found your way here—thank you for reading. 💜
And yes, yes, yes to everything you said. Writing has always been how I make sense of things too, and I think there’s something really beautiful about naming what hurts or what matters out loud. So grateful for this little blogging world and the way it brings us together.
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“is this blog — this public processing — just a way of saying, “look at me”? couldn’t i have just kept a private journal? wouldn’t that feel more sincere?”
I find that this is true of my blog – it’s a way to show up to the world. To quote you, “to reflect, to remember, to make it make sense.”
The piece about your grandmother was beautiful. I also love hummingbirds, and they were my mother’s particular favourite.
I think evolving rather than clinging dogmatically is a good choice. Would that more of the world followed your good example.
Congratulations on your decade-and-a-half of blogging on WP. One more year, and your blog can drive 😉💖
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I often wrestle with sharing my thoughts publicly—especially since I started doing soul homework. But then I remind myself that if none of us ever talked about things openly or wrote about our experiences, how would we learn or grow? I don’t have all the answers, but I’ve learned some things along the way, and sometimes I need to write them out just to make sense of them for myself. I’m really glad this resonates with others—not just writers.
Thank you so much for your kind words about the piece about my grandma. I also love that hummingbirds were your mom’s favorites—they’re my mom’s favorites too.
And yes, evolving instead of clinging feels like the way forward—I wish more of us embraced that gentle flexibility.
Thank you so much, friend! I can’t believe it will drive next year! 🤣
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A friend of mine recently ran their old online journal through one of those fancy AI systems to get a summary of themselves. It was disarming (and felt accurate) to see their evolution of being and thinking so plainly laid out in a few bullets.
“You should submit yours!” they exclaimed and I was like NO WAY. (I mean, I’m sure all the content in the world has been vacuumed up into the collective system conscious anyway.)
Having these moments to reflect of our own volition feels more valuable.
I love that you’ve been able to identify the shifts, questioned purpose and most importantly, kept showing up for yourself — and in kind, for us.
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That’s such an interesting idea — but I totally get your NO WAY reaction! It’s kind of wild to imagine AI digging through all our words like that. There’s something really human and irreplaceable about reflecting on our own terms, right? Still, if you do end up trying it, I’d be super curious to hear what you think afterward.
I really appreciate you noticing those shifts and how I keep showing up. It means a lot to have people like you along for the ride. Here’s to keeping at it — for ourselves and for each other. 💜
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Thank you for sharing this soulful history of your writing journey, Kari. I see you and appreciate and enjoy your genuine voice and heartfelt way of sharing stuff that matters.
I too tend not to talk about my blog with people I know, maybe it’s modesty, I don’t know. Few friends follow, and even fewer engage, which sort of puzzles me… oh well. I have my blog friends, eh?!
I also don’t name people unless they are public figures or performers (like my oldest son); it’s just easier that way, since I do daily posts and the timing of getting approvals would bog things down. It gets a little challenging finding references to a “someone” I’ve mentioned before as a result, but I’ll just call that good as a memory exercise! I decided at the start to give my dear one the moniker “Sweety” as it’s my blog and I don’t feel it’s right to share her personal story, other than some of my experiences of her relating to the songs of our life together.
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Thank you so much for this. I feel the same about not talking much about my blog outside of this space—maybe modesty, maybe self-protection? It’s a strange feeling when friends or family don’t really engage, even when they know it exists. But yes, thank goodness for blog friends who really get it.
I love how intentional you are with protecting your loved ones’ privacy while still weaving them into your stories. 💜
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Awww, thanks so much! And you’re welcome! ☀️
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The community aspect of blogging is really important to me, too. It was interesting to hear you grapple with the point of your blog because it definitely is complicated. On one hand, it’s my personal journal (if it didn’t get posted on the blog, did it really happen?), but on the other hand, it is public, so I can’t just dump everything on it, right?
ANYWAY. Congrats on 15 years. Here’s to many more!
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Yes, exactly! It’s that strange mix of private and public, right? Sometimes I feel like I’m just talking to myself—and other times, I remember there are actual people reading, which can totally change what (or how) I share. Thank you for the kind words—and for being part of this space. It means a lot. 💜
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I love the sound of your blogging journey and – despite knowing the name of your blog – didn’t realise you’d published a book. You know I’m going to look for it now, right?
Congratulations to you on your wonderful anniversary. I am so grateful I found your lovely community and look forward to enjoying many more years here <3 <3
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LOL—well, you might have trouble finding it, so I’ll give you the title. It’s still buried somewhere in the bowels of the blog: “Not My Mother’s Menopause.”
Thank you, friend! I’m so grateful you’re here and part of this community. 😘💜
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Happy blogiversary, Kari! So much of what you share in this post resonates deeply with me. I have always wrestled with how and why I blog vs writing in a personal, private journal. I don’t know why blogging works for me when journaling doesn’t, but I think you’re onto something when you talk about feeling seen and wanting connection.
Your writing is so full of kindness and light. I’m glad you’re here.
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Thank you so much, Suzanne! It’s interesting how blogging and journaling can feel so different, even though both are forms of writing. I think you’re right—there’s something special about feeling seen and connected that blogging offers in a way journaling doesn’t always.
I’m glad you’re here too. 💜
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I love the insight, depth and wisdom in this post. You definitely have come a long way, baby! (You’re probably too young to remember that slogan. ;-) )
I don’t remember how long I’ve been reading your blog, but I can definitely see your shift and growth over the years.
And for what it’s worth – I loved your screenplay!
I hope you indeed feel seen here. And surrounded by readers who care and relate. Community is everything.
My First Best Friend (Cin) periodically teaches a women’s writing group called, “Splitting the World Open”. The phrase is from a poem – you can Google it. I do believe you are doing just that. Keep on doing your soul homework, going inward and reflecting, and sharing your writing with us for many more years.
xoxo
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Aww, thank you so much, my friend. I definitely remember that slogan—Virginia Slims cigarettes!
I always think of you and Brian when I think of my screenplay. You were both so encouraging and kind when I was publishing it, and that meant so much to me. 😘💜
I always feel seen here. I really do believe that having community in this space is what helped me walk away from Facebook—and that’s not an easy thing to do!
I looked for the poem online and couldn’t find the actual version, so if you ever come across it, I’d love to read it. But I love the sentiment you shared. I’ll definitely keep doing the work—it’s been a lot of fun. Thank you for always reading and commenting. Love you. 😘💜
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Oops, sorry, I misspoke: the words are not from a poem, but from a quote. The author is a poet! I had poetry on my mind. ;-)
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Haha, no worries—I totally thought it was just me! I really do love the idea behind it.
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