Every year-ish, I try to create a blog post centered around the year we are leaving as it pertained to my blog. But posts like that have always felt a little hollow to me. I mean, I could talk about my blog all the damn day ( I write a blog, remember??), but I feel like that kind of post is boring for you.
Especially if you haven’t been reading that long.
Because let’s be honest, do you really care what my most popular posts are? Where my readers are coming from? How many pageviews I had last year alone?
So in typical A Grace Full Life fashion, I stumbled onto a new idea. but made it LOOK like I knew what I was doing all along.
I’m really good at that, for those who are new.
WordPress gives me all of my statistics in a handy dashboard that I see every time I open my blog editor.
And in that dashboard are my “site stats”, which includes information such as Top Posts and Pages, Referrers (sites that send people to my blog), Blocked Malicious Login Attempts (EGAD, also there were over 5,000 of those last year alone EGAD), and the like.
There is also a section for Search Engine Terms. Meaning = what people type into Google or Bing or Swagbucks etc. etc. to get to my blog.
I should state that they most likely aren’t searching for my blog but rather landing on my blog by gently being directed by the firm hand of Google.
This took me down a rabbit hole of sorts. A messed up rabbit hole of how the hell people are finding A Grace Full Life.
Let’s just say there are some sick fu#%s out there.
Here are my top seven Search Engine Terms in honor of me wrapping up year eight of blogging, followed by your Least Favorite Posts of 2018.
Because life is too short to be full of yourself.
1- “how to get your act together”
Two whole searches for this makes me think I might be an expert. Maybe I should write an ebook and affiliate link it everywhere. Iyanla, move the hell over.
2- “award-winning child cookie recipe”
For the last time, I DON’T BAKE CHILDREN INTO COOKIES.
3- “ham pickle dip”; “pickle rolled dip”; “hams and pickles”
Holy shit do you like yourselves some hams and pickles.
4- “you suck Target”
I only got one of those but I am kinda happy about it.
5- “I feel like complete shit, Ferris”
Whoever searched this and landed on my blog, I love you.
6- “panty butter”
I am conflicted because on the one hand WHAT THE ACTUAL EFF YOU SICK EFF??
7- “200 dollar fuschia couches”
They are red.
And they weren’t $200.
Dammit Google, are you even doing your job?
And last but definitely not least, the bottom of the barrel posts that you really hated in 2018!
1- Any and all of the screenplay posts.
I’m not even linking them here. You know where to find them.
2- Lice prevention.
I was paid to write it. I hate lice too.
3- Buddy’s dog food.
Again, paid post which all of you really seem to hate.
Again, paid to write it. I see a trend…..
Listen, I know all the posts I write won’t be as good as those award-winning child cookie posts, or when I write about all the hams and pickles, but it’s fun to poke fun at yourself.
It also helps me decide what to write in the new year.
So no matter how you found me in 2018 or earlier, I am grateful for every one of you.
Except for you, panty butter. Go to church.