Blogging, Humor, Life, Nonsense

How People Found My Blog in 2018

Writer McWriterson

One of my goals at the end of each year is to publish a blog post that summarizes the preceding year in terms of how it pertains to the blog. I chose to make it interesting for you since I am concerned that reading a post like that may bore the hell out of you.

WordPress provides me with all of my statistics in a convenient dashboard that I can access whenever I open my blog editor. And on that dashboard are my “site stats,” which include statistics like Top Posts and Pages, Referrers (sites that send readers to my blog), Blocked Malicious Login Attempts, and so on.

There is also a section dedicated to Search Engine Terms. That is, what people enter into Google, Bing, Swagbucks, and so on to get to my blog. I should point out that they are most likely not searching for my blog, but rather have been steered to it by the firm hand of Google.

This led me down a sort of rabbit hole. A twisted rabbit hole of how the hell people find my blog. Let’s just say there are some sick fu#%s out there.

In honor of my eighth year of writing, here are my top seven Search Engine Terms, followed by your least favorite posts of 2018.

Because life is too short to be full of yourself.

Stay humble.

1- “How to get your act together”

Two separate searches for this have led me to believe I am an expert. Maybe I should publish an e-book and use affiliate links to promote it everywhere?

2- “Award-winning child cookie recipe” 

For the last time, I DON’T BAKE CHILDREN INTO COOKIES.

Geesh.

3- “Ham pickle dip” “Pickle rolled dip” “Hams and pickles”

Holy shit do you like yourselves some hams and pickles.

4- “You suck Target” 

I only got one of these but I am sort of happy about it.

5- “I feel like complete shit, Ferris” 

I love the person who searched this and ended up on my blog.

6- “Panty butter” 

I am conflicted because on the one hand WHAT THE ACTUAL EFF YOU SICK EFF??

Also, totally great rock band name.

7- “200 dollar fuschia couches”

It was red.

And it wasn’t $200.

Dammit Google, are you even doing your job?

And last but definitely not least, the posts that you really hated in 2018!

1- Any and all of the screenplay posts.

I get it, loud and clear.

2- Lice prevention.

I was paid to write it. I hate lice too.

3- Buddy’s dog food.

Again, paid post which all of you really seem to hate.

4-College care packages

Why do you hate to see me getting paid?

Listen, I know all the posts I write won’t be as good as those award-winning child cookie posts, or when I write about all the hams and pickles, but it’s fun to poke fun at myself.

It also helps me decide what to write in the new year.

So no matter how you found me in 2018 or earlier, I am grateful for every one of you.

Except for you, panty butter. 

15 thoughts on “How People Found My Blog in 2018”

    1. I have two but I have two old ones as well, so four total. But I haven’t checked the other two in YEARS. Actually, one is Hotmail which doesn’t exist anymore, I don’t think.
      So what happens when you don’t check an old account after years of inactivity? Do they just close the account? Because I would love to read some of those old emails!
      You didn’t think you’d have to work when commenting on my blog, did you? Maybe that’s why a lot of people don’t comment…….

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  3. OK, Panty Butter (you know I will always have to think of you this way now, right?):
    I’ve been reading long before 2018, for which I want a prize. Oh wait, my prize is that I’ve been reading you for longer than one paltry year. You know I’ve said more than once that yours are the only sponsored posts I ever even click on. But still, your non-sponsored stuff is what I love most. Unlike with every other blog, however, I don’t begrudge you any sponsored posts. At least you TRY. And a girl’s gotta make a living.

    Now, off to see what lovely terms take others to my blog. But I know they won’t be as good as yours. Ever.

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  4. I only have 4 search terms. (FOUR) And they are ALL boring. (“Rita’s Notebook” is #1 with a whopping 9.) There are 172 “unknown” search terms, and I’m not even sure that that means. That only bots are reading my blog, except for 10 or so good friends? Probably. You win the internets, today, for sure.

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  6. Hilarious! It made me go check and see how people find my blog but they’re basically all two versions of #1 my actual blog name or #2 a blank template of a person/boy/man etc.

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  7. OK, I refuse to believe that there are any posts on here that people actually hated! Also, the very idea that people are googling things and finding YOUR blog is amazing! I am sooooo not there yet. And wow, panty butter. Which post did that lead them to? Was it the band name one? I’m both proud and terrified.

    I wish we could see which link ups brought people here, cause I’m still not sure where we met. And I’m sure it will bother me until the end of time. Even though I’m so very very glad we did!

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    2. Back again! Took a screenshot of the panty butter to show you that I couldn’t click on the term so how would I find out what post it took them to? Because now I need to SEO the hell out of that post so that never happens again.
      Of course, I can’t add pictures here so email me and I will send it to you. 🙂

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