Blogging, Favorite Things, Life, Menopause, Pets, Soul Homework, Universe, Writing

Seven Existential Questions

Writer McWriterson

My friend Ally is great at sharing posts that make us think. A while back, she shared this article about Minnie Driver’s podcast, in which she asks each of her guests seven existential questions. The questions were inspired by The Proust Questionnaire.

Ally’s responses to the seven existential questions can be found here.

Here are the questions and my answers:

December 2020

1- When and where were you happiest?

I have two answers.

Winter 2020-2021-I was in the early stages of soul homework and at the beginning of my enlightenment. I remember how good it felt at first, learning the answers to many of my questions about myself and healing some pretty deep wounds. It was also during the lockdown and winter, so it was quiet and I didn’t have any commitments. I remember Ella and I making our own schedule and how good this felt.

Late summer/early fall 2021-I was doing things with family and friends again, but my circle was smaller by choice. I was putting the tools I’d learned in soul homework to use in real time, and it was the most noticeable happiness I’d ever felt.

2- What quality do you like the least about yourself?

That I still worry about what others will think.

I mean, look at the way he looks at me

3- What relationship- real or fictional-defines love for you?

My pets. I cannot think of any being on this planet who has loved me more unconditionally or selflessly than my pets. I believe that most humans who have owned any type of pet will agree. I don’t have to do anything but show up for them to love me. We should all learn from animals.

“The love between a human and their pet is completely uncomplicated. There are no interpersonal dynamics to worry about. It’s one of the few relationships in life that you can express your love freely and without self-consciousness. ..”- Pooja Lakshmin from this article

4- What would be your last meal?

I thought about this for a long time.

I have so many, because FOOD.

Creme brulee

Rebecca’s egg rolls

My mom’s shrimp dip

Crispy tacos from The Other Door

Three Layer fries from Paradise Pup

Mike’s homemade chocolate chip cookies

A slice of sausage deep dish from Lou Malnati’s

Warm, homemade bread with good Irish butter

A bottle of good white wine

Kristen’s homemade latte/A Starbucks drink of my choosing (I have many favorites)

This could honestly be a blog post…

5– What person, place, or experience has most altered your life?

Soul homework and marijuana (in that order)

I did the soul homework for two years before having several life-changing  “high” experiences in the summer of 2022. Some might call it an awakening. Since then, it has changed the way I see everything and everyone.

6- What question would you most like answered?

What happens to us after we die? To be clear, I don’t want to die in order to find out. I’m just interested in what happens to our consciousness/soul.

From this book

7- What in your life has grown out of personal disaster?

Me.

By the end of my perimenopause, I was completely overwhelmed, so I wrote a poorly written book about menopause to help me get through it.

I was still feeling terrible.

Anna then mentioned that she wished to learn how to “manifest.” She learned about it from a new app called TikTok. So I bought her a book that she never read. Instead, I read it, and it changed my life forever.

That book gave birth to soul homework.

Soul homework was brought into my life to heal me, not the act of writing my book. But I couldn’t see it at the time. I hadn’t considered it until recently.

Since then, I’ve grown in ways I never imagined possible. My entire worldview has changed, and as a result, I feel incredibly content.

What would your answers be?

37 thoughts on “Seven Existential Questions”

  2. I thought I’d given my last meal a lot of thought, but my answer (“fried chicken”) really pales next to yours. I’d love to read an entire blog post on yours, so feel free to share if you’re so inclined! But I refuse to read it on an empty stomach.

    #6: absolutely agree. Unless the answer is “nothing,” in which case, I’ll stick with the whole ignorance-is-bliss thing.

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  3. Pets are everything. No one will ever adore me as much as Hannah the Dog. I’m happiest when I’m with her. (Please don’t ever share these sentences with my husband.)

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  4. I’m glad you answered these questions. I liked them, obviously. Thanks for linking to me. I adore your last meal. It is all-encompassing and answers the question in a way that never occurred to me. I’m so happy that your soul homework has helped you find your true self during some rather confusing times. Good job, Kari. When the student is ready the teacher will come.

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  5. Ooooooo Kari, I love this, I love this, I LOVE this!

    Instead of answering here, I think I will post this on my own blog when I have more time to think about my answers. In fact, I may do it this week.

    However, your answer — “My pets. I cannot think of any being on this planet who has loved me more unconditionally or selflessly than my pets. I believe that most humans who have owned any type of pet will agree. I don’t have to do anything but show up for them to love me. We should all learn from animals.”– I TOTALLY agree with you! Pets define “unconditional love” more than any being on this planet.

    Thank you, and also Ally, for giving me the idea for a new blog post!

    Have a faaaaaaaaabulous week, my friend! X

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    1. I’m so glad you’re going to do one on your blog!! I can’t wait to read your answers!

      I love my children unconditionally, and I don’t want anyone to think I don’t love them or my husband, but they are humans, and humans struggle with the unconditional part. But pets, man. They teach us what real love is.

      Ally is the best for ideas like this. I like how she makes me think outside the box. You, too, do it. I am extremely grateful for the bloggers in my life.

      Have a wonderful week as well, my friend! 😘

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  6. I love this so much. I love that you have grown and are so much happier now from all your Soul Homework!
    I have some similar answers as you (pets, kids!), and I have the same question as you on #6!
    I don’t know what my last meal would be…I’m gonna have to think on that one.

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  9. Wow, this is really deep! I wouldn’t be able to answer these questions off the top of my head. I’d have to really think about them. I loved reading your answers.

    I certainly do understand the unconditional love of pets. You are absolutely right that all we have to do for them to love us is show up. And feed them. 😉 I already know in my heart that when Clementine crosses the Rainbow Bridge and our house will be pet-less for the first time in our entire marriage (over 38 years!), that I will go through a horrible mourning period. I am so used to having a fur baby around. Maybe in the distant future we can get a pet again, so it’s not like I’m saying no more pets EVER. It depends on so many factors.

    Food…you had me at creme brulee, crispy tacos, homemade chocolate chip cookies, and deep dish pizza. I was curious about the place where you get crispy tacos so I clicked on the link…but it went to Paradise Pup! Just FYI.

    xoxo

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    1. Ally posed these questions in January, and it took me this long to finally publish the post, so it took a lot of thought on my part as well.

      Melanie, I completely understand what you’re saying. Remember when Joy flew out the window? We’d only had her for seven months, and I ended up grieving her for months. It was very difficult. So I can only imagine how difficult it will be when Clementine passes away. And I understand the conflicting emotions about whether or not to get another pet. My parents felt the same way after their previous dog, Tink, died, and now they have their beloved Dolly. As you mentioned, it depends on a number of factors.

      Uh oh! Thanks for the heads up! (I think you and Brian might enjoy The Other Door)

      Xoxo

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      1. I would love to get another cat (or two!) when Clementine is gone from this earth…but the main reason why we’re not doing so is because we want to travel. Esp with Tim living in CA now, we want to be able to just jump on a plane and go out there to see him. Can’t do so with Clem being old and sick. Even with younger cats, you have to have a pet sitter. Which costs a lot of $$. And not fair to leave them for an entire week. I remember doing that in the past years with other cats we’ve had and they got lonely and angry and defecated on our couch! We also want the freedom to take off for a weekend when the mood strikes us. And…we need a break from the responsibility, care-taking and the financial aspect. With what we’ve spent just in the past 6 years alone with three sick cats (ER visits, specialists, lots of tests, medication and prescription food), we could’ve bought a new car! Sooo…maybe someday down the road when we’re older and more apt to stay at home instead of traveling. In the meantime, I’ll just have to love more on my friend’s pets, including Buddy and Biscuits. ❤

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      2. I completely understand. We don’t have much freedom with two dogs…and now Ella’s bird AND a hamster.🤣

        You are welcome to come over at any time and love on these animals. They love you as well.

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  10. Darn! I left a comment this morning and it has disappeared. What I said was that one of the many things I love about you is how you are the living embodiment of no mud, no lotus. You have reframed pretty negative things into really positive ones, and have grown from painful experiences. I mean, being the happiest ever in the height of the pandemic is pretty incredible. Talk about finding your own sunshine! I really love it.

    I read that exact same piece about the death of the dog, and boy, did I feel that. The exact same paragraph stood out to me too! Our dogs just love us so unconditionally. I mean, no one else goes insane with happiness when I come into the house, having been gone ten minutes.

    In terms of last meals, I would like an entire meal made out of dips and desserts, with a Greek salad. Like, hummus, baba ganoush, guacamole, salsa, creamy cashew dip…probably with chips or pita bread. Then a whole array of squares and cakes. Definitely there would be red wine involved. And a HUGE Greek salad. One might even say A Big Salad. xoxoxo

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    1. Wow, I never thought about it this way. Thank you, friend. No mud, no lotus. 😘❤️

      I’m working on another list of 100 things I love, and I swear there are more dog things on it than anything else. I SWEAR I LOVE MY HUSBAND AND CHILDREN.

      DIPS AND DESSERTS. Appetizers and desserts complete me.

      Thank you for this comment. Really. 😘

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  11. This is great. You went really deep here. I think my happiest moment would be the birth of my children, or finding out I was pregnant, or when Coach proposed. Very happy moments.

    Your last meal is a well thought out adventure in eating. I love it. Mine would be more simple: AS MUCH GLUTEN AS I COULD STUFF IN MY PIE HOLE. I’d start with Oat Squares – the world’s best cereal. It would end with cake, many different varieties, and maybe some cookies. Oh, how I love smiley face bakery cookies. In the middle of these two courses would be lots of other gluten offerings like pasta. This could go on for a very long time.

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    1. Those are such happy moments! Those are happy times in my life as well, and now I’m regretting my answer…🤣 

      Your gluten comment made me laugh. I’m reminded of Harry Caray (I believe it was him?) who said he’d smoke cigarettes on his last day of life. I should have included that as well. Even after 16 years, I still miss smoking…

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  12. I loved your answers. I’d have to think on them though. My impulsive answer to the last meal would be fried chicken, but then again your answer is so much better, honestly. I am so glad Soul Homework has helped you so much.

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  13. I appreciated your answers. I will try to answer a few:

    I was most happiest in college. It was the ‘real’ me, not the me others expected me to be (daughter, wife, mother, grandmother). I had a lot of friends from all walks of life, not just the white suburban moms I’m friends with now. I was a leader in clubs and I loved learning. I miss that life.

    Last meal: pizza with a Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon followed by donuts (creamsticks) and a cafe latte.

    Life altering experience: my junior year of high school, I went on Close Up, which was a trip to D.C. where you are immersed in government. None of my friends went, so it was my first step outside my comfort zone. I learned how to be an extrovert on that trip and it changed my life completely. I went from being a wallflower in high school to being the person who everyone knew in college. It’s weird to write that, but that’s pretty much what happened.

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    1. I never went away to college, so I really appreciate this response. The real you. Would you say that was your awakening?

      Creamsticks and a latte. Oh, man. Please pass the plate …

      Wow, okay, so I write my comments as I read the comments, if that makes sense. Now I’m wondering if this was your awakening. Isn’t it interesting how we change once we leave our families? We grow up one way and then evolve? This isn’t meant to be negative; it’s simply how we find ourselves in the world.

      Thank you for sharing your answers here. These kinds of posts are my favorite.

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    1. Thank you, Jessie. It means a lot because you remember me from pre-soul homework. Mike, my children, and my parents have all witnessed this transformation firsthand, and I sometimes forget that all of you who have been here since the beginning have as well. I am so grateful to all of you for still being here. ❤️😘

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  16. Kari, I’ve had this on the back burner too ever since Ally’s post. I’m glad I’ve held back as there’s been a fair few shifts experienced recently which may influence how I’d answer. I will do it… soon. But I am absolutely delighted by your answers and to read how you went looking for answers because of peri-menopause, even if you found them where you didn’t expect to.

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