Blogging, Humor, John Hughes, Menopause, Nonsense, Tater Tots

Titles Don’t Come Easy, You Know

Kari
 

I sat at my computer for ten minutes trying to come up with a title for this post, and this is the best I could do.

Sure, I could have called it miscellaneous or etc. or things that come to mind randomly. but those feel like titles from a new blogger, not someone in her seventh year.

Screw it, I’m eating tater tots was a close second.
Honestly, that could also be the title of my memoir.

I’m starting to think I might be nearing the end of this blog.
Not the end end.
Just… the end of blogging.

Maybe it’s a quiet nudge.
Time, Kari.

 

My blog isn’t helping matters. It’s currently inaccessible on chrome, which feels personal. I now have to use Firefox just to edit posts.

So Firefox, thank you for showing up when Google does not.

John Hughes, Chicago, Screenplay, Don't You Forget About Me, The Breakfast Club, 80s, 80s Movies

 

The other night, Mike and I were watching The Breakfast Club, and I found myself wondering how many words were in the original screenplay.

So naturally, I googled how to write a screenplay for idiots and ended up reading a wiki tutorial while the movie played in the background.

I couldn’t tell if I was watching a movie or accidentally taking a class.

Person Wearing Red Hoodie

 

Meanwhile, menopause is kicking me in the nuts.
I don’t have nuts, but give it time.

No one tells you how relentless perimenopause is.
Or how long it lasts.
It feels like forever.

Childbirth was hard, but at least you get a baby.
This?
This gives me a hairy chin and a personality I don’t recognize.

Image result for raise your hand if you're a little bit of an asshole
Courtesy of Pinterest

 

I still think this is a great band name

I miss bloggers.
Where did everyone go?

It feels like someone farted at a party and the entire room cleared out, and somehow I’m the fart.

Except the diy/recipe/lifestyle bloggers remain.
They will outlive us all.

Bring back fun bloggers!
 

 

 

White Dove on White Bird Figure Stand

Prince died.
While I am going through perimenopause.

That feels unfair.

Ella was devastated when it happened. deeply, unexpectedly devastated.

A few days later, purple rain came on in the car, and she sang along with me.
Well, she sang the only words she knew.

purple rain, purple rainnnnn.

She told me that was all she had, and I told her prince would love that.
I really think he would have.

That same weekend, a dove moved into our garage.
We named him Prince.

 

humor, pic monkey, canva, graphics

 

Recently, I went back to edit an old post and fell into a rabbit hole, reading everything I used to write.

And I realized something.
I was funny.

Like, really funny.

And now?
I’m… less funny.

Not gone, just… less.

Which led me to a dangerous thought: what if i’ve already peaked?

What if all my creativity is being poured into something no one will ever see?
Like a screenplay I don’t know how to finish and no one is asking for?

What if i’m done?

This must be what kim kardashian feels like.
And god help her when perimenopause hits.

 

Then this morning, I opened a box of trix.

No color.

Just dull, responsible little cereal pieces.

No artificial colors.

No chemical chaos.

Apparently we’re healing now.

But I don’t want healing.
I want the neon cereal.

I want the old blogs.
My old voice.
Prince. 

And while we’re bringing things back, bring back the bloggers too.

But only the nice ones.

 

 

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14 thoughts on “Titles Don’t Come Easy, You Know”

  4. MENTALPAUSE lasts forever. That’s the part no one tells you! Hot flashes, night sweats, facial hair, no waistline, dryness “everywhere”, crabby AF. Oh yeah, like puberty on steroids.

    xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Interesting post! Hate to hear menopause was bad for you, not me. I was soooo worried as I had heard all sorts of horror stories but one day it just happened and the next day was fine :) Hubby takes the same med for his my migraines, big side effect – he can’t drink carbonated beverages any longer, says the med makes them taste awful.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. You ARE funny- ‘hair on my chin’, etc. Had me laughing. For reals. I struggle titling my blog sometimes. Too long? Is it related to the post sufficiently? Menopause- I look forward to your post about it. I am constantly like maybe this issue or that issue is cuz of menopause. The weight gain is ANNOYING! Love the tater tot posts and enjoy now nowing their history.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I personally like your blog titles because they are real and tell what you are going to talk about. I put way too much effort into titling a post sometimes but most of the time, it just comes right away.

      I am glad you love them because another one is publishing this morning LOL. :)

      Like

  7. AND, now I even have time to go back and read this post I missed because of migraine. :-) And I think I missed it the first time around.

    I was once on a preventative that also gave me signs of MS. Only my NEUROLOGIST didn’t make the connection to the new meds. He was VERY concerned that I had MS and was setting me up for a full round of tests when I googled the medication (which I don’t think was Topomax, but it might’ve been? I tried several back when I was still willing to try preventatives) and figured out all by myself that I was having an allergic reaction to the meds–which same doctor had recently upped the dosage on. I have severe trust issues with the medical establishment. PCOS, endometriosis, fibromyalgia (which means: we don’t know shit about why you’re in pain, but we’ll acknowledge that you are), and migraine will do that to you.

    And for whatever it’s worth: You are really funny. Back in 2016 and still today. Looking forward to the coming enlightenment on menopause. A doctor sometime in the past year or so told me that it never goes away. Which is why I’m still on HRT 14 years after my hysterectomy. Weaning off, weaning off…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You will appreciate next Monday’s post then.

      I went through the same thing when it was decided I needed to wean off of Topomax. They had me scared to death that I had MS as well. For a preventative that THEY prescribed and they knew the side effects. HEAD SLAP.

      Like

  8. So in terms of blog posts, this one is actually perfect. Like, you could use this post to teach the bloggers how to blog. If there were still bloggers, interested in learning how to blog. Seriously, you are a goddess.

    Liked by 1 person

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